Fear vs Love
by HappilyGrey
Summary: Cassie is a 20 year old girl, trying to escape a dangerous group she got involved with. She stumbles upon the Abigail and makes her plan to leave her group once and for all. This is her story, about trying to survive in a world that is not what it used to be. The story takes place a month after the group leaves Mexico.
1. Chapter 1

I laid on the cold, tile floor, only a thin layer of a folded blanket between me and the ground.

I sighed greatly as I rolled on my side and faced the wall. I could hear some small chatter going on somewhere else on the boat.

It was rocking slowly in the waves, even though it was stationary.

Suddenly, I felt the presence of someone else enter the room I was being held in. I could feel their eyes watching me.

It was silent.

Weren't they going to say anything to me? Interrogate me some more?

But they said nothing.

I was already handcuffed, it wasn't like someone had to _watch_ me all day.

I could hear their breathing.

Now I was getting annoyed.

I understood them not trusting me. I did come on their boat with a group to overtake it. But that wasn't my true intentions. I turned on my group mates and protected these people.

Sure, my plan was slightly flawed. But they needed to realize that that was my only way out of my group, for good.

And I wasn't in the clear yet. Them holding me hostage here was going to come back and bite them in the ass. Big time. The others in my group would be coming to look for me. They would overtake this boat themselves without a second thought. They would slaughter everyone.

These people were in serious danger by keeping me here.

"I'd prefer if you didn't watch me." I finally said. "I'm not going to do anything."

"No one asked me to watch you." A man's voice said behind me. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

I couldn't make out whose voice it was. He sounded young.

"I'm fine." I said shortly.

"Look, I'm sorry we're keeping you in this room." He said. "It's just for our own safety. Well, for everyone else's. I'm not as paranoid as they are."

I rolled my eyes.

"I know they're making you supervise me." I said.

He laughed. "Honestly. They're not. I just came to talk to you."

There was a long pause.

"You did, after all, save my life."

I then realized who was in the room with me. The guy with the crazy hair. I remember stabbing Mark, who was about to stab him. He wasn't prepared with a weapon. Mark caught him off guard and quickly had him hanging halfway over the boat rails, with a knife to his throat.

I finally rolled over, sat up and saw him sitting in a chair, facing me.

A smile came across his face. "Name's Nick."

I scanned his face suspiciously.

"Thanks for saving me." He said. "For saving all of us."

"If I would've known I'd be held in this room for this long after saving all of you, I probably wouldn't have." I said, bitterly.

"Can't say I blame you." He replied.

There was silence. We just sat staring at one another for a few moments.

"I just need to be let go." I finally said.

"They're discussing what they're going to do right now."

"No. You don't understand." I started. "I _have_ to go. Like now. The longer I'm kept here, the more in danger you are."

"Are you saying you're a murderer?" He said as he smiled slyly at me.

"I think we can drop the labels by now. Aren't we all essentially murderers?"

"You make a good point." He replied. "But, why do you need to leave so badly? Everyone's thinking of letting you stay."

I shook my head. "I can't stay here."

"The handcuffs would be coming off…unless you're into that sort of thing." That same mischievous smile crept across his face.

I rolled my eyes again. "These cuffs aren't doing a damn thing. I could get out of them if I really wanted to."

"So then, why haven't you?" He leaned forward, closer to me.

"Because, I didn't want to worry your group. They're obviously extremely shook up after what happened. If they came to find an empty room with just a pair of handcuffs left, I think that would cause even more panic. I've put a time limit on my…captivity. If they're not off of me and I'm free to go by tomorrow morning, I'm out."

"Understandable." He replied. "But still, don't you wanna stay? I know it seemed like we weren't fully prepared for the ambush, but we are pretty stable. We have food, fresh water. You'd be okay here."

"None of you are okay if you stay here. My group will come destroy you." I replied.

"Your group- no offense, but they sound terrible. What, do they just find people and kill them and then take what they need?"

"Basically." I replied.

"What makes you so sure they'll come for us?"

"Because I never came back."

"Yeah, but you made it clear that you didn't want to go back to them. I mean isn't that why you did all of this? To get away?" Nick asked.

"Yes. But, you're missing the big picture. They will be coming for me. No one leaves the group."

"So, you're saying that they will be coming to get _you_?"

I nodded. "Yes. They probably have already figured it all out. Either they think that we failed the mission and we got killed, or that we are being held hostage by your group. Both of those scenarios lead to the same thing. They will be coming for your people. And they will kill every single one of you."

His eyes got wide as he started realizing the significance of the situation. He sat back in the chair, staring blankly at the ceiling.

"That's why you need to let me go, and you all need to get as far away from here as possible." I said.

"But why can't you come with us? Why do you have to leave?"

"Then they will know it was me. They'll know I'm still alive and that I warned you to go. And they will follow us. They won't leave you alone until they have me back." I replied.

"But if you go, then they will be tracking you forever. You won't be able to escape."

"But you can."

He stared at me, his brown eyes practically piercing mine.

"You _need_ to tell everyone this." He finally said.

"Of course." I replied.

"But I can't let you leave- go out on your own. You'll die."

I laughed. "I was on my own for quite a while. I'll be fine. It was nice actually."

"But you said so yourself. They'll find you. Eventually."

"I'll just have to keep running." I said. "I went through all of this to get away from them…to get out. I'm not going to give up easily."

"Can you at least wait until you tell everyone what you told me before you just disappear?" Nick asked.

"Once I tell them, they'll want me gone. It's the only way for you all to stay safe. They're not going to pass up safety, for my sake."

"You don't know that. I was practically in the same situation. I was reckless. They would have had an easier time if I wasn't with them. But they stuck by me and helped me pull myself back up. They won't just toss you out."

I fiddled with the handcuffs around my wrists.

Suddenly a blonde woman, who appeared to be the group's leader, walked into the room followed by two men.

"Nick, what are you doing in here?" She demanded.

"We were talking." He said. "Needed to thank her for saving my life."

"Saving your life? Have you lost your mind?" The tall Hispanic man asked.

"You shouldn't be in here." The blonde woman said to Nick as she pulled him up by the collar.

"Really? Because there's something she needs to tell you."

"Whatever she needs to tell us isn't important. We can't trust anything she says."

"You do know I can hear you." I said.

They all shot a look at me, staring at me with angry eyes, except for Nick who was smirking.

"Look, I know you don't want to listen." I said as I managed to stand up. "But you're all in huge danger."

"Yeah. We are since you're still here." The Hispanic man spat at me.

"Exactly my point actually. But not for the reasons you may think." I replied.

"Go on." The blonde woman said.

"My group will be coming after you since I didn't return to them. Their rule is three days. After three days, they will come. And you don't want to be anywhere near here when that happens."

"Why is that?" The woman asked.

"It's a complicated story that I don't want to get into." I started. "But they could be thinking that you all killed me and the others, or that you're holding us hostage, which is actually the truth, only it was _me_ who killed my partners. Either way, they will come to kill all of you. They already know where you are. We had been spying on you for weeks."

"What do you suggest we do?" She asked.

"You let me go, and you get the hell out of here."

"They won't let her leave." Nick interrupted. "When you become part of the group, you can never leave. That's why all of this happened."

"I'm sorry?"

"The group I'm part of, they're sick, _sick_ people. I couldn't leave on my own. So once they let me come on this mission, I knew it was my chance to escape. I was never planning on killing any of you, only the guys I came with."

"And you just thought we'd let you leave?" A bald Hispanic man asked.

"What would have happened if they had gotten to one of us first before you killed them?" The woman asked.

"I didn't let that happen. I knew the plan and where they'd be. I made sure none of you got hurt. I waited to ambush you when I saw you had your weapons nearby." I replied. "Like I said, I've been watching you."

They were silent, processing the information I had given them.

"All I'm asking is you let me go and leave. As long as I'm not with you, you're safe. They'll only be looking for me once they realize you're gone." I finally said.

"Mom, we can't just leave her out there." Nick whispered to the woman.

Mom? She was his mother?

"You're right." She whispered back.

She turned back to me. "When do you suggest we leave?"

"As soon as you possibly can. It will take them a day or two to make it to where we are, but don't wait much longer."

"You don't think we can take them?" She asked me.

I shook my head. "I've been trapped with them for months. I've seen what they're capable of. I wouldn't take my chances."

She was silent, pondering what exactly the plan would be.

"We will follow your advice, on one condition."

I nodded in reply.

"You stay with us."

"Madison!" The tall Hispanic man roared at the woman.

"She has to stay with us! We can't just leave her to die out there!"

"She looks like she can take care of herself pretty well from what she did to us! Isn't that why we have her handcuffed and locked in here in the first place? Do you expect to just leave her like this forever, so we feel safe?"

"Sorry to interrupt." I started. "But you're right. I _can_ take care of myself. I got good at it. And also, the handcuffs are pretty useless."

I fiddled with them for a bit with a pin I had tucked in my sleeve.

I unhooked one side of them in seconds. "See?"

Nick laughed and was grinning from ear to ear.

"If I really wanted to hurt you, I would have done so hours ago."

Madison looked stunned, but a small smile appeared on her face.

"Do you really want to be out on your own?" She asked.

"Honestly, I can survive by myself." I replied.

She shook her head. "I asked if you _wanted_ to be alone."

I pondered that for a moment. "You seem like you have a decent set up here, you responded to my attack fairly quickly."

"We can fend for ourselves well, I'd say." She replied.

"Do you realize what you're risking by keeping me around?"

"Yes. I do. But we will have you officially on our side to help with that. I'm assuming you know how, based on what I just witnessed." She joked.

"I know a thing or two." I smirked lightly.

"You're staying." She said firmly. "The handcuffs can stay off for obvious reasons, but I'm still going to have you stay in here until we all feel comfortable. Understand?"

"Yes." I replied.

"If you cross us, I won't hesitate to take necessary action."

I nodded.

"Nick will bring a cot in for you and some water. You can clean yourself off. We will discuss more in the morning."

"Thanks."

"Name?" Madison asked.

"Cassie." I replied.

She nodded. "Madison, Travis, Daniel. And my son, Nick."

I smiled lightly.

"Don't make me regret this." She added.

And with that the three of them left, leaving only me and Nick.

"Told you they'd let you stay." He said.

"Your mother's in charge?" I asked.

He nodded. "Sort of. She obviously sees how much we could benefit from having you here."

"I suppose."

"Show me that handcuff trick sometime?" He smirked.

"We'll see." I replied.


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, I woke up, as the bright sun peeked through the giant window of the room I was in.

I sat up and stared out of the window. I could hear the familiar sound of chatter coming from another room. I decided it was time to get up, since I needed to talk to Madison about the plan, and we didn't have time on our side.

I got up and threw my sweatshirt over my body. Then I made my way to the other rooms of the boat.

I saw Madison sitting at a table with Travis. They were eating granola bars and talking quietly to themselves.

I cleared my throat nervously, to make my presence known.

They both looked over at me.

"Good morning." Madison said.

"Morning…" I replied dryly.

"Breakfast?" She asked.

I nodded and she tossed me a granola bar.

I unwrapped it and began eating.

"Is there anything to drink?"

"Water is over there. Along with tea and instant coffee. Help yourself." She replied as she pointed to the kitchen cabinets.

I walked over and began making myself some hot tea. The tea kettle on the stove was still warm. I poured water in a mug and searched through the different tea bags. I decided on some lemon tea, due to my dry, sore throat.

"I'll leave you two alone." Travis whispered to Madison. "I'll be with Salazar. Yell if you need me."

She nodded and he kissed her forehead before leaving.

I felt a tad awkward. I shifted uncomfortably as I dipped my tea bag in and out of the water. I took a sip and felt it soothe my throat.

"You know you can sit down." Madison said to me.

"Alright." I replied. I made my way over to the table and took over Travis' seat across from her. I didn't want to seem rude.

"I want to apologize if my son was giving you a hard time."

I shook my head. "Oh…uhm he wasn't. He just came to talk, I guess."

"He can be quite the…charmer." She replied.

I smiled lightly. "I could tell."

There was silence as I sipped my tea.

"I just want to thank you." I said. "For giving me a chance. After what I did, I would never think letting me stay with you would be an option."

"Yeah? I'm surprised with that decision myself, actually."

"I honestly didn't mean any harm." I started. "I know that's hard to believe when you see me sneaking onto your boat with weapons, but I really didn't want anyone to get hurt. I made sure no one did. If there had been another way out, I would have taken it."

"You don't have to keep explaining it to me. I was a high school counselor before all of this. I understand what kids have to do just to stay alive. Even before any of this happened." She replied.

"I just want to make sure we're clear on everything. I don't want to threaten anyone's safety."

"Don't worry. They'll come around. Just maybe not as easily as Nick."

I finished my granola bar and got up to throw away the wrapper.

"About your group." Madison started.

I froze by the garbage can.

"Why couldn't you leave on your own? Were they holding you hostage?" She asked.

I paused, trying to find the right words.

I sighed and turned to her. "It's…complicated. To say the least. But, yes. I guess you could say they held me hostage, in a sense."

"Do you mind explaining it a little better?"

"They…uhm- they make it extremely hard to get out. Basically, it's either you stay and follow their rules, or you die trying to leave."

"Were these your friends or family before all of this started?" She asked.

I shook my head. "No…no they weren't my friends. And certainly not my family. Although, they wanted to be. They believed we were a family."

"You said you were on you own in the beginning. Did they find you?"

"Sort of. I found them. But really they found me. Weeks before I ever saw them."

"You mean they had been _watching_ you?"

"Yes. They had been following me for weeks. I think they were checking out my skills, seeing how well I could defend myself against the infected, how well I could find food and water."

"How do you know they did all of that?"

"I saw them. Every once in a while, I'd get a glimpse of one of them." I replied.

"So how did you find them then?"

"I had a map with me. I'd plan out my next move, what route I would take. I'd trace it with pen, so I wouldn't get lost. And so I'd have a backup route in case the first one didn't work out. That particular path I was taking was one that I assumed would be popular with the infected, so the day before, I went out on it a little ways. I stopped by this water tower, I was thinking I could stay there if it ended up being a two day trek. When I saw it the day before, it was empty." I paused.

"They must have seen my map, while I was sleeping. Or followed me the day before. Because a small group of them were camped out right underneath the water tower. I had no choice but to stop and talk to them. They acted like they'd been camped there for days. Then they convinced me that I would be safer with them, that they had food and running water. So I agreed."

"You went with them even though you knew they'd been following you?"

I sighed. "Even though I was doing fine on my own, the idea of being with a group, being safer, seemed like a good option. I was almost out of food and needed to find water, and they had plenty of both. They made it seem like the better choice."

I paused and looked down, trying to hold back the tears.

"They really knew all the right things to say…"

I was quiet.

"Cassie, I'm sorry for whatever you went through with them. We're not like that. I can almost guarantee that we're different than they are."

I nodded as I sat down.

"But we're going to need your help." Madison said.

"Hey." A voice said from the doorway.

I looked back and saw Nick making his way in to the kitchen.

"You're up early." Madison said.

"Didn't sleep much. Plus I knew we were all going to be figuring out a plan." He replied.

"We we're actually just discussing Cassie's old group."

"Yeah?" Nick asked sarcastically as he went over to get water. "What were they like?"

Madison looked at me and saw my saddened expression. "Uhm. Not good. They weren't good people."

"Yeah, I know. But what made them bad?" Nick asked as he sat next to Madison and across from me.

I was silent. I stared quietly at my cup of tea.

"We didn't discuss the details." Madison said. "They were just bad people."

"I figured, since you had to kill your own members just to get out." Nick said to me.

" _Nick._ " Madison scorned.

"It's fine." I finally said. "He's right. I did kill them."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out like that." Nick said.

"Excuse Nick, for being insensitive." Madison said as she shot him a look.

"No really. Its fine." I paused. "I just- I'm not quite ready to say everything that happened while I was with them. Just trust me when I say that they are terrible. And we still need to plan to leave soon."

"We agree one hundred percent." Madison replied. "I'm going to go find the others, and see what's a good time for all of us to talk. Make yourself at home."

Madison got up and left the kitchen.

I sat across from Nick suddenly feeling very awkward.

"Look I am sorry if I sounded like an ass." Nick finally said.

"S'okay." I replied. "I guess that's just how you are."

"Whoa." Nick chuckled. "Someone's sure feisty in the mornings."

I glared at him. Who the hell did he think he was?

"I'm not an asshole, at least not all the time." He added. "I swear."

I was still silent.

"I _am_ the one who convinced everyone to let you stay. I'm on your side."

"I didn't ask for that." I replied shortly.

"Yeah. I know." Nick said. "I was doing you a solid. Thought I was helping."

"Well, you didn't." I replied. "You're not helping."

"How is that exactly?" He asked, obviously getting slightly mad. "How is me helping you stay with us a bad thing?"

"You obviously don't care about the people you're with, your family. If you did, you wouldn't let me stay after I told you how dangerous it was."

He stared at me hard. "Wow. Really?"

"Yes. _Really_." I started. "If you cared for them- if you cared about any of this, you would have listened to me and let me go."

"So that's what you think? That I'm just some reckless, heartless asshole?"

"Pretty much." I nodded.

He laughed shortly and shook his head. "I did this so _you_ would be safe."

"I can take care of myself."

"Clearly, you did a great job at that." He replied. "Weren't you just talking to my mom about how awful it was with that group? If you were doing so well on your own, why did you end up with them?"

"I don't need to explain myself to you."

"Neither do I." He replied.

He stood up and went to throw away his breakfast bar wrapper.

"At least I said thanks when you saved _my_ life. And you think I'm the ass?"

He exited the room, leaving me all alone.

I angrily ran my hands through my messy hair.

What the hell was his deal?

Was he going to start acting liked I owed him for what he did for me?

He was going to be sadly mistaken.

Later that evening, we were all crowded around the same kitchen table. Nick stood at the doorway however, and we kept making angry and awkward eye contact.

He was obviously pissed at me, but I wasn't backing down.

He got everyone in to this mess, and now we all had to deal with the consequences.

"So, what do you propose we do?" Travis asked.

"If you all have the means, I say we leave." I replied.

"Do you think we all have the power to make it far enough away?" Salazar asked.

"Strand, what do you think?" Madison asked as she turned to the well-dressed black man leaning against the countertops.

He sighed greatly. "We have enough to get us out of this particular area, but not that far."

Travis scoffed. "Fantastic."

"How far could we go?" I asked.

"Probably only a few miles." Strand replied.

"That's not going to work." Travis started. "We have to get further away than that."

"No kidding." Strand replied.

"Could we find enough supplies?" Madison asked.

"We don't have that much time." I said.

"We will have to make time." Strand said as he walked over to the table.

I sighed, getting the feeling they didn't understand how in danger they were.

"What do you suppose we do then?" Madison asked.

"We need more gas. We don't have enough to get us where we need to be, to be safe." Strand replied.

"And you think we can find that here?" Travis asked.

"We've got to look." Strand replied.

"So we're basically stuck here until we can find enough gas?" Salazar asked, getting annoyed.

"Looks like it." Strand said.

"I can't believe this." I said quietly under my breath.

I rubbed my eyes, frustrated.

"Do you have a better idea?" Strand asked me sternly.

He must have heard me.

Everyone's eyes shot to me. I felt like I was under a white hot spotlight.

"Yeah." I started. "Be prepared for what's coming."

"We can do this." Madison said as she stood up. "We can work quickly and get this boat ready to go."

"I'm not so sure." Travis said. "She all said we're in danger. If we can't leave then…"

"Then we will fight." Strand interrupted.

Everyone was silent.

"Just stay calm. I know this all seems crazy, but we have to stay calm." Madison said.

"So what's the plan?" Nick finally said.

His voice startled me, I forgot he was there.

"Cassie, you know this area well right?" Madison asked.

"Uh, yeah." I replied.

"Then we can start going on scavenges. There has to be gas here somewhere. See if there are any boats who may have extra stashes." Madison said.

"We have to be smart about this." Strand said. "But I agree with Madison."

"We can take shifts. Each of us will have a job to get this done quickly."

"You need to have people on guard." I said. "At all times. I'm not sure when they will show up, but I do know they will. And we may still be here when that happens."

"Good point." Madison said.

"So who's doing what?" Nick asked as he stepped into the kitchen.

Madison pondered the question for a few moments.

"Salazar and Travis can stay and watch guard. Take turns since we need it around the clock." Madison started. "Strand, you can work on making sure the boat is up for the journey since you know it best."

She paused.

"Cassie and Nick, you guys can go on runs to find the supplies we need."

We exchanged glances.

"Nick, do you think you can handle that?" Madison asked.

"Yeah." He replied.

"I mean it, Nick. There can be no funny business. You need to stay focused." Madison said as she moved closer to Nick.

"I will." He replied. "I promise." He kissed Madison's forehead and gave her a reassuring smile.

"Alright, then. It's settled." Madison said. "Everyone rest up."


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning, I was sitting at the table and drinking more lemon tea.

I was trying my best to process what had happened last night and the decisions everyone had made.

I felt nervous. I knew this group was fairly strong, but I still wasn't convinced they had what it took to take on my old group.

My anxiety kicked into high gear. I could feel my whole body tense up.

I tapped my fingers nervously on the table, as my mind raced to all of the bad things that could very well be happening soon.

What the hell was I going to do?

I was a full blown part of the group. They needed me to make it through this. I was in too deep now.

I thought about leaving. Just sneaking off and leaving.

I was up way before anyone else and I could easily make a run for it.

I stood up and took off towards the room I was in.

I grabbed my small backpack and began filling it with the few things I had lying on the floor.

I grabbed my weapons and flung the bag on my back.

I had to get out of here. I had to make sure these people were safe. I had to leave before I changed my mind.

I began walking backwards towards the doorway as I scanned the room to make sure I had all my stuff.

Suddenly I bumped into someone.

"Going somewhere?" The voice asked.

I spun around to see Nick staring back at me, his brown eyes glaring at me.

"I-I…uhm." I stuttered.

"You've got to be freaking kidding me." He shook his head in disbelief.

"Nick, get out of the way." I said, trying to regain my confidence, but my voice quivered.

"What? No." He replied as he planted his hands firmly on the door frame.

"So that's it? You're just going to leave us?" He asked.

"Nick, I'm not joking. Move." I said angrily.

"No."

"Move! MOVE!" I yelled as I tried to push my way past him.

He stood strong as he grabbed my arms and guided me backwards.

He shut the door quickly and stood back in front of it.

"Fucking _move!_ " I said as I charged at him.

I slammed into his chest and he grabbed my arms again, only this time he held onto me harder. I could feel his fingers digging into my skin.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He asked. "You're leaving? _Now_?"

"This is none of your business!" I spat. "Let go of me!"

"It is my business! You can't leave!"

I tried to break free of his grip. I thrashed my body back and forth. "Let go!"

"No!" He said. "Not until you calm the fuck down!"

My body began to shake. I was so angry and my head was spinning.

"Please just listen to me! For one second! Just hear me out!" He said.

"Just _listen to me_." He repeated.

I stopped trying to get away, my breath harsh and ragged.

He started at me, our eyes locked.

"Please don't leave." He finally said as we both tried to catch our breath. "We need you."

Those words hit me hard. I began to slowly calm down and relax. I felt him loosen his grip on my arms, now his hands gently rested on them.

"Please." He said as I rolled my eyes. " _Please_."

"Why?" I asked. "Why do you need me so badly?"

He sighed. "I know I told you that we were a really solid group, and that's the truth…sometimes."

He paused.

"But, we aren't strong enough to take down your people. We all know it. Whether or not my mom will admit it. We will die if we try to do this on our own."

"You're going to die either way." I replied. "I tried to give you an easy way out."

"How? By me letting you go out there and get killed?"

I shook my head. "I would have been fine. I told you to let me go."

"I wasn't going to do that. I know what it's like out there. I wasn't going to be the one who sat back and let you die."

" _I would have been fine_." I said sternly. "Do you not get that?"

"No. I guess I don't." He replied. "Did you want to end it? Did you want to just leave and get eaten alive or killed by your people? I mean is that what you _wanted_ to happen?"

"I could have made it all by myself!" I yelled.

"Yeah fine! Whatever! I'm sure you could survive on your own!" He started.

There was a long pause.

"But _we_ can't."

I looked at him and saw his worried expression. He was genuinely scared. For everyone.

I backed away from him slowly and began to take my backpack off.

I set it down next to the bed and I plopped myself down.

I ran my hands through my hair and looked up at him again. He still stood in front of the closed door.

"I'll stay." I finally said.

"That's all I'm asking." He replied.

We locked eyes again and I could still feel how worried he was.

"Can I be alone for a while?" I asked.

He sighed. "Yeah. But I'll be watching."

I nodded.

He opened the door and walked out, closing it behind him.

Later that night, after going over the final plan for tomorrow morning, I stood out on the deck off of the kitchen.

It was a nice, calm evening. I could smell the salt in the air from the ocean.

There was heat lightning every so often. It lit up the dark sky for several moments before I was engulfed back in the darkness.

I was dreading tomorrow.

I couldn't seem to get along with Nick for the life of me, and I really had no idea why.

It's not like he did anything that horrible to me. But still every time he was around, I found it insanely hard to be nice to him.

I guess I just couldn't get over the fact that he was willing to put his own family in danger to protect me.

But I didn't need to be protected. I made that perfectly clear to him.

I was only staying because of how badly I felt for everyone. They were in danger. And now it didn't matter if I was here or not. Either way they were screwed.

He probably thought he was some knight in shining armor to me- rescuing me from all of this.

It was all so irritating.

Suddenly I felt a presence from behind me.

I began to panic.

I grabbed my knife I had in my back pocket and gripped it.

I spun around, ready to attack when I saw Nick's distinct hair peeking out around his shadow.

"Jesus Christ." I said as I let my tight grip go on my knife. "You scared the shit out of me."

"Sorry." He replied.

I stood there and stared at him. I could barely see him, from the candles lit on the kitchen table.

"Can I help you?" I asked as he just stood there.

"No, no." He replied. "I honestly didn't think anyone was here."

"Mmhm." I replied.

I turned back around and leaned on the railing. I expected him to turn and leave, but instead he walked over and leaned on the railing next to me.

We were both silent. I watched him quietly out of the corner of my eye.

He just stood and stared out at the water. I couldn't read him, I couldn't tell what he was feeling.

I felt like I should say something.

"Why are you out here?" I asked, bluntly.

He looked over at me. A smirk came over his face.

"Why? Am I bothering you?" He asked.

"Not particularly. I just don't know why you're standing here with me and not saying anything."

"You're not saying anything either."

"I'm not the one who walked in on someone's alone time." I replied.

He chuckled.

"What?" I asked.

He laughed again. "Nothing, nothing."

"No seriously. What?"

"You're just...funny."

I looked at him puzzled.

"I'm _funny_?" I asked.

"Yeah." He smiled. "You get all bothered by me, even if I'm not saying anything to you, you still get bothered. It's funny."

"You haven't exactly given me a choice." I replied, trying to hide a smile.

"Ohhh." He laughed. "So that's what this is, huh? You think I'm annoying."

"Annoying, selfish, reckless…"

He looked over at me, still smiling.

"I think you're hurting my feelings." He joked.

"Good. Mission accomplished." I replied.

He laughed and I tried to hide my laughter the best I could.

We were silent again, both of us watching the lightning flashes.

"Ready for tomorrow?" He asked as his face was illuminated, briefly.

"I suppose." I replied.

"Don't sound so excited."

"Trust me." I said playfully. "I'm not."

He turned towards me once again, a smile spread across his face.

"You gonna bust my balls all day tomorrow?"

I shrugged. "We'll see."

We both exchanged smiles.

"Alright then." He smiled.

"See you in the morning." I said as I turned to leave.

I walked back to my room.

Was he just flirting with me?


	4. Chapter 4

I woke up early the next morning. I could hear people talking already, so I knew everyone was up getting ready for what the next few days had in store for all of us.

I sprang up and got dressed before making my way to the kitchen.

Nick was already awake and was finishing up putting canned food and breakfast bars in his backpack.

Madison and Travis sat at the table and ate their breakfast.

I could see a dark haired girl a tad older than me, making a cup of instant coffee.

She smiled at me briefly and walked out on to the deck, making her way over to Salazar. She handed him the cup and kissed his cheek.

"There you are." Madison said from the table. "I was about to send Nick in to wake you up."

"Er…sorry." I stuttered, as I made my way over to grab a granola bar.

"Cassie, you can put those water bottles in your bag." Madison said as she pointed to the filled bottles on the counter.

I stared over at them. There were quite a few. Like a few too many.

"Uhm…how long do you plan on us being gone?" I asked.

"Possibly a few days." Madison replied. "Is that a problem?"

"No, no. I just-." I started. "I didn't realize it was a few day mission."

"Well, we just want you guys to be prepared. We figured that you could try and get to that neighborhood up on the hill over there. Strand thinks some of those people could own boats."

I nodded.

"Have you been to that area since…this?" Madison asked.

"No. I haven't actually." I replied. "But I know my way around it. I have- _had_ friends whose parents lived there. Some of them owned boats."

"Good. That's good. Helpful." She replied.

I began filling up my backpack with the water bottles as I ate my food.

Madison got up and walked over to me as Nick left the room.

"Now Cassie, we know you have experience dealing with all of this on your own. Nick, he's fairly new to this. But he knows how to defend himself. I don't want you to think he doesn't know what he's doing."

"Oh. Yeah." I replied.

"He's had… _experience_ with something kind of like this, before the world went to hell. He's been through a lot. He's a strong kid. I wouldn't have paired you two up to do this, if I didn't think you could do it."

"Yeah. I understand." I replied. "I'm sure he'll be okay."

She nodded. "Look out for him, will you?"

"Of course."

She smiled.

"Ready?" Nick asked as he returned to the kitchen.

"Yeah." I replied.

Travis stood up and came over to Madison's side.

He grabbed Nick and pulled him into an embrace.

"Be careful, Nick. Don't do anything stupid." Travis said as he hugged him.

"I won't." Nick replied.

Then Madison pulled Nick close to her and held his cheeks.

"Please dear God Nick, be safe." She whispered.

"Mom, I will." Nick replied.

She kissed his forehead. "Please _be safe_. I love you."

"Yeah. Love you too."

"Keep Cassie close okay? Look after her."

"I will, I will."

She gave him another kiss and let him go.

"Use the walkie I gave you, okay? Give us updates. I'll have it on me all the time."

"Mom, we got it." Nick smiled. "We'll be alright."

She nodded. Travis pulled her into him and held her for support.

"See you in a few days." Nick added.

I gave a nice smile and a nod to Madison and Travis.

"Lead the way, boss." Nick smiled as he motioned for me to walk ahead of him.

We had been walking for a few blocks. Things were pretty quiet. There were a few infected here and there, that we took care of, but for the most part it was pretty deserted.

We hadn't said anything to one another since we left the boat.

We were both very tense, and on edge. Our focus was on the threats that surrounded us, not on making conversation.

"To your left." I said quickly to Nick as a living dead man in a tattered blue t-shirt approached us.

He let the infected walk over towards him, as he placed his hands square on his shoulders.

I walked over as he held the man out at arm's length, and jammed my knife into the man's skull.

He gave a last grunt and then fell swiftly to the ground.

"Good eye." Nick said as he adjusted himself from the mild scuffle.

"You adapt quickly when you're alone." I replied as I wiped my bloody knife on a nearby tree.

"So." Nick started. "How long were you alone before you ended up with those people?"

Here came the conversation. Goodbye silence.

"Uhm." I said. "A month or so, I'd say."

"Whoa, a _month_?"

I nodded.

"How did you do it? I mean, it can't be easy being alone in all of this."

I shrugged. "I just…did it. My survival skills kicked in I guess."

We were silent.

"I wasn't always on my own before finding the group…" I said.

Why was I offering details about my life to him?

I didn't know a thing about him, so why did I feel the need to tell him more about myself?

"Oh? Who were you with?"

"Friends. And my brother." I replied.

I stopped and saw what looked like a bunch of supplies stacked inside an abandoned car.

"Let's look through this." I added as I pointed to the car.

Nick nodded and we each took a side of the car.

"So what happened to them?" Nick asked as he searched.

I rolled my eyes. I was hoping he'd just let it go and focus on finding supplies.

"They, uh…they didn't make it." I replied.

"What happened?" He asked as he jolted upright and stared across the car at me.

"More looking, less talking." I said as I dove back in to the packed car.

He went back to looking. After a few more moments we had went through the whole car.

We found some useful supplies, and stuffed them in our bags.

"Well, no oil." Nick said.

"Wasn't going to be that easy." I replied. "Let's go."

I slammed the car door shut, flung my bag back on my shoulders and continued up the hill.

"You were with your younger brother?" Nick asked, starting the same conversation again.

"Yes." I replied simply. "And older."

"Older. Got it. Were you with him when it all went down?"

"I lived with him." I replied. "So, yes."

"Do your parents live around here?"

"They lived in a few towns over." I replied.

"Did-did you see them…you know, when it happened?"

"You ask a lot of questions." I laughed.

"I like answers." Nick smiled.

"Well, you wouldn't mind giving me a few answers then, huh?"

"Sure." Nick replied. "Ask me anything."

"Your mom, she said something to me before we left. Something about you having experience with situations similar to this. What did she mean?"

"Oh." Nick stuttered. "She meant that I used to go out alone a lot. On scavenges and stuff."

"She said that it was before this all happened."

He looked suddenly tense. He looked at the ground, trying to avoid eye contact with me.

" _Oh_." Nick said. "That."

"Is something wrong?" I asked, concerned.

"No, no. I, uh. I just-"

"You don't have to answer that. Really. It's okay."

"It's a lot to get into." He replied.

He finally looked up at me.

"I'll tell you about it. But, not when we're out here. I don't want to get distracted." He added.

I nodded. "Rain check?"

He smiled. "Sure."

We continued walking and killing a few infected on the way.

Later that evening, the sun was starting to set and we could hear the distinct crackle of the walkie in Nick's pocket.

"Nick." Madison's voice said.

"Your pocket is talking to you." I joked.

He chuckled and pulled it out.

"Mom. Yeah. We're here." He replied.

"How is everything? Are you alright?" She asked.

"We're fine. Good."

"It's getting dark, are you somewhere safe for the night?"

"Uh, working on it." He replied.

"Don't mess around. Just find somewhere to go quickly."

"Mom, we are. I promise. Cassie is looking for a place that seems safe."

"Okay good." She said. "Did you find anything yet?"

"Just some food and first aid stuff. No oil."

"Dammit. Okay, that's okay."

I found a small house that seemed to be empty, from what I could tell from peering into the windows.

"Nick. Seems good. We need to check it out though." I called out to him.

"Mom, we're going to check out this house to stay in tonight. I'll give you a call when we get settled in."

"Okay, honey. Be safe." She replied.

"We will."

Nick placed the walkie back in his pants pocket and made his way over to the front porch where I was.

"Get your weapon ready." I said to him. "Can you pull out the flashlight from my bag?"

He nodded as I spun around so that my back was to him. He unzipped my bag and pulled the flashlight out.

I turned it on. "Ready?"

"Yep." He replied.

Our body's tensed up again. We braced ourselves for the worst.

We began to enter the house, taking small steps as we listened for any sign of life in the house.

It was eerily quiet. The only sound that could be heard was our breathing.

Nick took a few steps ahead of me as we made our way deeper into the house.

Suddenly we heard a loud noise.

I let out a small yelp as Nick jumped in front of me to protect me.

His arm was draped around my body and pulled me closer to his back.

Then we heard the distinct noise of squeaking as a big black rat ran past our feet.

We both let out a huge sigh of relief as he let go of me.

"Stupid rat." Nick breathed.

Our heartbeats slowed down a bit and allowed us to relax.

"Should we check upstairs?" Nick asked as he motioned to the stairs off to our right.

"Yeah. I'm thinking we stay up there if it's clear." I replied.

"Alright. Let's go."

Nick led the way. I handed him the flashlight, since it was almost completely dark now.

We took our time walking up the stairs.

We made it to a long hallway with several doors.

"Stay close." Nick whispered to me.

We came to the first door on our right.

Nick put his ear to the closed door and listened for a few moments.

"Seems empty."

I nodded to open the door.

He opened it very slowly, pushing it open with his foot, holding a tight grip on his knife.

The room was empty. It was a small bathroom.

We let out sighs of relief and proceeded back down the hallway.

There were two doors left, one more on the right and one at the end of the hallway on the left.

He did the same thing as before and placed his ear against the door.

He began to open it as we got ourselves ready.

Once again, the room was empty. It was a child's room.

It was strange and creepy.

I felt instantly sad. There were toys littered all over the floor, like the child left in a hurry, in the middle of playing.

"One more left." Nick muttered.

We made our way to the third and final door.

"What's behind door number three…" Nick joked.

I laughed quietly as he pressed his ear against it.

We had been lucky so far. I hoped our luck continued.

He turned the door knob slowly as I raised my weapon.

Slowly he pushed it open with his foot, my heart pounding in my chest.

The door opened way to a bedroom with a neatly made queen sized bed.

It was empty.

"Home sweet home." Nick smiled as he walked in.

I followed behind him and shut the door behind me.

I made my way over to the closest.

"Toss me the flashlight." I said.

Nick threw it to me and I began to check the closet, to make sure we were really alone.

"Do you know how to pick 'em or what?" Nick said.

I looked over at him and saw him throw himself onto the mattress.

"Don't get too comfortable." I replied.

"Why not?" He asked. "I'll let you choose what we watch." He joked as he tossed me a TV remote.

I caught it and tossed it back to him.

"Seems like a good place to sleep." I said as I took off my backpack.

"Dinner?" Nick asked.

I nodded.

"Okay." He started as he began to dig through his backpack. "Tonight's dinner choices are corn or chicken noodle soup."

"I'll have the special." I joke dryly as I lit some candles.

"Chicken soup it is." Nick replied.

I sat down next to him on the bed and made myself comfortable, as I opened two water bottles.

He pulled out a can opener and two spoons, and began opening the can of soup.

He handed me a spoon.

"Dinner and a movie. It's almost like we're on a date." Nick joked.

I smiled as I looked at the blank TV screen staring back at me. "I've always wanted to see this movie. How did you know?"

"Lucky guess." He winked.

He handed me the can of soup. "Dinner is served." He said with a cheesy fake French accent.

I laughed and took a bite of the lukewarm canned soup.

"Mmm, so good." I joked as I handed him the can.

He took a bite. "Don't worry, we can complain to the waiter."

An hour or so passed. Nick was on the bed, reading my copy of The Great Gatsby that I had always carried with me.

I was sitting by the window, staring out at the empty streets below us.

Every once and awhile I'd see an infected stumble by the house and off into the darkness.

We seemed to be undetected so far.

But as a precaution, after we ate I had Nick help me push the dresser in front of the door.

Couldn't be too careful.

"This is a good book." Nick stated. "I'm ashamed that I never actually read it in high school."

"It wasn't required for you to read it?" I asked.

"Oh, no. It was." He said. "I just watched the movie instead."

I laughed. "That doesn't surprise me."

"I'd take offense to that, if I weren't so busy reading." He smiled.

"Are you at a good stopping point?" I asked him.

"Yeah. I suppose. Why?"

"I thought maybe you might want to finish our conversation from earlier." I boldly stated.

"Oh." He said simply. "Actually, yeah. I had a few questions that never got answered."

"Likewise." I replied.

"How about we take turns?"

"Alright. You go first." I said.

He closed the book and sat upright on the bed.

"So, what was your brother like?" He asked.

"He was a good guy. He's the one who taught me how to survive on my own. He taught me a lot of things, actually."

"Can I ask what happened to everyone you were with?"

"You can." I started. "When it's your turn."

He smiled. "Fair enough."

"Where did your group come from?" I asked.

"Originally, Los Angeles." He replied. "Now, what happened to your brother?"

I took a deep breath. I hadn't spoken about this to anyone before. I was honestly trying to forget what I saw.

"We had a small group at a campground in Lake Tahoe." I started. "There was five of us all together- me, my brother, and a few of our friends."

I paused. "I went off to try and find firewood. It-it was mid-evening. The sun was setting. We were having a party for my brother's birthday."

I stopped again. Nick's eyes were hard and focused on me.

"Basically, the noise attracted the infected. And…and they attacked everyone."

"Holy shit." Nick replied. "What did you do?"

"I ran. I just grabbed my stuff and ran. My brother told me to get as far away as possible. So I did."

"How the hell did you make it through that?" Nick asked, his face covered with worry.

"I don't think I ever made it through." I replied.

"But, you did. You survived on your own after that. Look where you are now."

"Yeah, I made it physically through it. But mentally, I'm still there, in that exact moment, wondering what I could have done differently. I'll never get through it completely."

"Cassie, I'm really sorry." Nick said.

"It's fine." I said quietly. "It made me stronger."

We were silent for several moments.

"My turn." I finally said.

"Ask away."

"What was your mom talking about when she referred to your…prior experiences?" I asked.

Nick took a deep, long breath.

He fidgeted nervously with the book in his lap.

"Uhm, shit I don't even know where to start…"

"Pick a spot."

"Okay, alright." He took another deep breath.

What the hell was he about to tell me?

"I…I was an addict." He finally said.

"An addict?" I said, trying to hide the shock in my voice.

He nodded silently, clearly ashamed of what he just confessed to me.

"Can I ask what you were addicted to?"

More nervous fidgeting.

"Uhm, I was- I was addicted to…uhm…to heroin."

That word hit me like a ton of bricks.

I couldn't believe he was a drug addict.

"Shit." I managed to get out, suddenly feeling bad for what I said.

"Yeah. Not my proudest moments." He replied.

"You don't have to be ashamed. I mean it's in the past now, right?"

"Sort of." He began. "I'm still fighting it, every day of my life."

He paused. I was unsure of what to say.

"I just recently got over it…" He said in almost a whisper.

"What made you stop now? I mean, isn't it a tad easier to…score?"

"You'd think. And it is somewhat easier, but…I realized I needed to become more fit for this new world. Some of those…skills I developed trying to get drugs, definitely have helped me, in some sick and twisted way."

Another pause.

"But, I needed to have a clear head to really survive now. My urge may come and go, but I'm trying my best to stay clean. For my own sake."

"Wow." I breathed. "I never would have guessed that about you."

He chuckled uncomfortably. "Yeah. I'm full of surprises."

"I'm looking at you in a whole different light now." I said.

"Gee. Thanks." He replied sarcastically.

"No, no. I mean that in a good way." I started. "For you to go through all of that and make it out, on just your own will and strength, shows a lot about who you are."

He smiled and looked up at me for the first time since he told me his secret.

"I'm sorry for calling you selfish, for misjudging you." I apologized.

"It's cool." He replied. "It's partly true. I know I can be a bit of a jackass. I've put my family through hell, before any of this even started."

"That may be true, but at least you're pulling your weight in all of this. You've obviously became a core member of your group. They rely on you for stuff. That must feel good."

"Yeah. Yeah it feels nice when they think I can handle responsibility." He paused. "They haven't trusted me like that for _years_."

I smiled, noticing how free and happy he felt.

"Good stopping point on our game of twenty questions?" I asked.

He nodded.

"I think I'm going to get some sleep. We have another big day tomorrow." I added.

"Agreed." He replied.

I got up and walked over to my side of the bed. I blew out the candles and crawled under the warm blankets.

"Night." Nick said to me.

"Night."

Before I knew it, I drifted off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning, I woke up to the faint sound of rain hitting the window off to my left.

I sleepily rubbed my eyes and looked over at Nick.

He wasn't there.

I sprang upright and jumped out of the bed.

Where the hell was he? How did he move the dresser without me hearing?

My mind started to panic.

Had he left? Was this the plan all along? To trick me and leave me in this house?

I looked around and noticed that his bag of stuff was gone.

Mine was still right where I had left it.

I began to search through it frantically, checking to see if all of my belongings were still there.

They were.

I quickly put on my shoes and my nearby jacket. I swung my bag over my shoulders.

I grabbed my knife and opened the door to the hallway slowly.

It was empty and quiet.

I could hear a small scuffle noise coming from beneath me.

My mind immediately went to that Nick could have changed. He could have been bitten.

Or it could not be him at all.

But there was definitely someone else in this house.

I took a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves.

I took very gentle steps towards the stairs.

I paused at the top of them, straining my ears to better hear the noise being made.

I gripped my knife harder and began to walk down the stairs quietly.

I looked into the living room. It was also empty.

The noise was coming from the kitchen.

I got to the bottom of the steps and peered my head around the edge of the wall.

Empty.

I slowly began to slide my body against the wall, moving towards the kitchen.

The noise could be clearly heard.

I made my way to the edge of the wall.

Around the corner was the kitchen.

Suddenly, the floorboard under my foot creaked.

It sounded like a bomb going off against the quiet house.

The noise immediately stopped.

My heart felt like it was going to fly out of my chest.

I could hear footsteps coming closer to me.

Whoever it was, knew I was there.

I decided to go for it. I was ready to attack when…

"Cassie?" I heard Nick's voice whisper out.

I dropped my knife from the relief as I began to actually breathe.

Nick walked around the corner and looked at me.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Me? What the hell are _you_ doing?!" I demanded.

"I-I came downstairs to go through the cabinets. I thought maybe they might have some stuff we could use."

"I thought you left! Or changed! Or something!"

"That explains the knife." He replied as he picked it up and handed it to me.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." He added.

I shook my head as I tried to calm back down.

"You though I _left_?" He asked.

"I didn't know. I woke up and you and your stuff were gone. What else was I supposed to think?" I spat.

"I wouldn't leave you." He replied. "Honestly."

"Let's just get ready and go." I said. "Can you hand me a granola bar?"

He nodded. We walked into the kitchen and he grabbed a bar out of his bag.

I began to eat it as he continued to search through the kitchen.

"These people pretty much took everything with them." Nick said.

"Or someone else beat us to it." I said. "I mean the door was unlocked."

He chuckled. "Huh. I just assumed you picked it."

"I can when we need to."

"That's something we have in common." He replied as he put a jar of peanut butter in his bag.

He noticed me staring at him.

"What? Surprised the druggie can pick locks?" He joked. "Come on, now."

"I didn't want to judge you…again." I replied.

"Sometimes, those judgements are accurate."

He picked a few more things from the cabinet and then zipped up his bag.

"Ready to go?" He asked me.

I finished my granola bar as I walked over to the window above the sink in the kitchen.

"Wish we could just stay put and relax, pretend everything was normal." I sighed. "The rain is so nice."

He looked over at me and walked closer.

"It is nice." He replied.

"It's the little things we used to take for granted, that mean the most to me now." I whispered.

He gently rested his hand on mine.

It took me by surprise as I shot a look at him.

He smiled lightly at me as our eyes met. "Me too."

I smiled back.

"Honestly, this world isn't so bad anymore." Nick said as he lightly rubbed his thumb over my hand. "I kinda like it."

I gave another small smile.

"We should get going." I replied.

He nodded and moved his hand from on top of mine.

We grabbed our things and readied ourselves for the journey to the neighborhood on top of the hill.

We walked out on to the porch and I locked the door behind us and closed it.

We stood there for a few moments, and listened to the light drizzle of the rain. We tried to see if there were any nearby threats, but we detected nothing within our range.

Nick gave me and nod as he pulled his jacket hood up and we began our journey up the hill.

We had been walking for what felt like an eternity. There were more infected popping up the closer we got to the neighborhood.

The rain had turned into a mist and fog surrounded us. We had very limited visibility and it made me feel very on edge.

We were silent, straining our ears, since sight was not on our side.

It was late afternoon, we'd be lucky if we made it to the houses by the time night came.

My stomach rumbled.

"Hungry?" Nick asked.

"Yeah. A little." I replied.

"Should we stop and eat?" He asked.

I looked around at our surroundings.

"Yeah. This way." I said as I spotted a nearby house with a porch.

Nick followed me as I walked up to the house and sat down on the porch steps.

"Peanut butter and pretzels okay?" He asked as he took a seat next to me.

"Sure." I replied as I dug out a water bottle from my bag.

I took a few sips and then handed it to Nick.

He took a drink and handed it back to me before searching for the jar of peanut butter and bag of pretzels.

He found it and we began to eat, passing the jar between one another.

"You think we'll make it before dark?" He asked.

"I think we can make it, but we won't have time to search until tomorrow."

"So we should plan to stay somewhere in there tonight?"

"I'm thinking we should stay right outside of there. I don't know what we're walking in to. It's a big neighborhood. I don't think it's a good idea to spend a night in one of those houses."

"Do you think it could be…over run?" He asked.

"Possibly." I started. "I'm just being cautious."

"What do we do if it's gone to shit?"

"We try." I shrugged.

"There's only two of us…" Nick said sounding worried. "You can't be serious."

I was silent.

"It could be really dangerous." He added.

"We have to find gas." I said, staring at him. "If we don't, then everyone will be in danger far bigger than just fending off the infected."

He stared at me, not saying anything.

"Okay. Alright. We'll try." He finally said.

"Let's eat fast." I said as I took a big scoop of peanut butter.

We finished quickly and got back on our trek.

Later that evening, after we spoke to Nick's mom on the walkie, we finally made our way to the edge of the giant neighborhood.

The fog had somewhat cleared, and we stood looking at the rows and rows of houses in front of us.

"What's the plan?" Nick asked.

I sighed and looked around.

"We still have some light left…" I started. "We could pick a house close to the main road and get two things done at once. A place to stay and look for supplies."

"Sounds good. Which house?"

We began walking again. It was so quiet. The only noise was the light trickle of the rain.

We walked past the first house on the left and I stopped in front of a tiny, yellow cottage style house.

I surveyed it for several moments.

"Nice choice." Nick smiled.

I smiled lightly back before making my way on to the tiny porch.

"Get the flashlight?" I asked Nick.

He nodded and began to unzip my bag, pulling out the light.

We both got out our weapons and mentally braced ourselves.

I turned the doorknob. It was locked.

"Time to show me those lock picking skills of yours." I said to Nick.

He smirked. "Thought you'd never ask."

He dug his hand in his right pocket, pulling out a small, sharp pointed object.

He bent down in front of the doorknob and began to get to work.

In a matter of minutes, I heard the distinct click of the door unlocking.

He stood up and opened the door.

"After you." He said as he pushed the door open for me.

We both gripped our knives and began to make our way in to the house.

We did the same routine as before and checked the whole house.

It was clear.

The living room had a huge fireplace with a giant stack of wood next to it.

I stood in front of it, noticing how cold and wet I was.

"Want me to start a fire?" Nick asked as he put his bag down next to an oversized brown couch.

"I was thinking it would be nice. We could dry off." I replied.

"Do you think it's safe?" He asked.

"The fireplace or just in general?"

"Both." He replied. "I was just wondering if you think anything will notice the smoke."

I pondered that for a moment.

"I'm willing to take those chances." I replied as I took off my soaked rain jacket.

"Agreed. I'll get started and you can go look for matches." He said as he kneeled down in front of the fire place.

I nodded and made my way to the kitchen. I started searching through the drawers, when I saw a box of matches sitting on the stove. I grabbed them and made my way back to Nick.

"Found some." I said as I handed him the matches.

"Great." He replied.

I took a seat on the couch and watched him stack the wood and light the match.

The fire began to catch and the flames filled the fireplace.

Nick stood up and smiled as he admired the fire he had started.

"I didn't realize how cold I was, until just now." He said.

He took off his jacket and began to unbutton the blue flannel shirt he had been wearing underneath.

"I'm pretty soaked." He added as he took off the flannel and his undershirt.

I got momentarily distracted as I stared at his bare back.

"Uh, yeah. Me too." I finally said, snapping back to reality.

"Do you wanna get dry?" He asked as he turned fully to me.

I tried my best not to stare at him, standing in front of me half naked.

"Yeah. I will. In a minute."

"Alright." He replied.

He began to unbutton his jeans and they fell to his ankles. He slipped them off and must have noticed me staring.

"Don't worry. My boxers aren't wet." He smirked.

"Oh. Uh. Good." I stammered, trying to sound calm.

He began to lay his clothes out on the floor in front of the fire.

"Do you want to take off your wet stuff, so it can dry?" He asked.

"Nice try." I said.

"What?" He smiled. "Oh you think I'm trying to be a pervert, don't you?"

"You basically just told me to get naked."

"Only because your clothes are wet." He replied.

I glared at him with skeptical eyes.

"I promise." He smiled.

"Mmhm." I replied.

I walked over to my bag and began to search for other clothes to put on, but realized everything was sort of damp.

"Shit." I said.

"What's wrong?"

"All my clothes are sort of wet, the rain must have got in my bag."

"Oh." He started.

He walked over to his bag and pulled out a white tee shirt. "Here. You can wear this. It's clean."

I took the shirt. "Thanks."

Nick then grabbed a pair of flannel pajama pants out of his bag and slipped them on.

I walked over to the fire and began to slip off my shirt.

I glanced over my shoulder and could see Nick standing behind me, staring.

I turned around slightly and stared back at him.

"Oh! Yeah. Sorry. I'll give you some privacy." He said. "Unless…"

"Not happening."

"I was only kidding." He replied.

We exchanged smiles as he walked around the corner into the kitchen.

I took off the rest of my clothes and pulled Nick's shirt over my body. It smelled like him and I briefly noticed how oddly comforting it was to me.

"I'm done." I yelled out.

"I'm looking for some stuff, if you want to help."

"I will after I get warm." I replied as I began to lay out all of my wet clothes.

I huddled in front on the fire, pulling my legs close to my body.

I listened to the light noises of Nick rummaging through the cabinets and the crackling of the fire, for what felt like an hour.

Suddenly I felt fabric being draped over my shoulders. I looked up to see Nick putting a blanket over me.

"Found this in the closet." He smiled.

"Thank you." I replied. "Find anything else?"

He shook his head as he sat on the floor next to me. "No oil."

"Guess we'll have to go in further tomorrow." I replied, pulling the blanket tighter around me.

We were silent for several moments, both of us watching the flames.

"So, you used to have friends who lived here?" Nick asked, his brown eyes resting on me.

"Yeah. Well, their parents lived here."

"Do you…do you think they could still be around?"

I shook my head. "Honestly, I've tried not to think about it."

"That's understandable." Nick replied. "You're still around though. That's what's important."

I looked over at him and we exchanged smiles.

I reached over and felt my jeans sprawled out on the floor to my side.

"Dry yet?" Nick asked.

"Almost." I replied.

Nick got up and put another log on the fire.

"Nick?" I started. "Can I ask you something?"

He sat back down next to me. "Our twenty questions game continues."

"Sure." He added.

"Who…who got you started on drugs?"

His facial expression tensed up as a frown came over his face.

"It's more of a what than a who." He replied, the light from the flames gently bouncing off of his pronounced cheekbones.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have asked. I was just curious."

"It's fine." He began. "My…uhm…my dad died when I was thirteen. His death…it threw me for a loop. I guess you could say that's what started it all."

"Oh god. Nick, I'm so sorry."

"Yeah. It was a long time ago. But it really messed me up." He paused. "If you couldn't already tell."

"You're not messed up. You just made a mistake. Can't say I blame you."

"Yeah a mistake that has taken me _years_ to get out of."

"So what? Being an addict doesn't define who you are."

"It did." He replied. "It defined who I was, up until the world went to shit. Even after all of this happened, I still have to deal with it. I'm still an addict."

"You need to give yourself some credit. You've come a long way, apparently in a short amount of time." I replied.

"You don't know the things I did before this. If you did, you'd probably never speak to me again."

"If your family can learn to forgive you, and treat you like a responsible adult, then what makes you think I'd turn you away?" I asked.

He shrugged in response.

"We all had lives before this. There were things I did that I'm not proud of. Hell, I met your family with _guns_ aimed at their faces."

"Yeah, but you had a reason, a _damn good_ reason for doing that. You didn't choose drugs over your family, at a time they needed you most."

"Nick, stop." I began. "Whatever you did, it doesn't matter now. All that matters is you're here, you're present, you're holding your own. You're _surviving_. That's the only thing that matters."

"Yeah but, if you knew me back then, you'd want nothing to do with me."

I shook my head. "You don't ever have to tell me what you did. It's in the past. I know who you are now, and that's all I'll ever need to know."

We stared into each other's eyes, our breaths becoming slightly more ragged. We were inches away from each other. It felt like we were about to do something that would change everything.

"That's the first time anyone's ever said that to me." Nick said quietly.

"I don't care what you did before. I care what you do now." I whispered.

Nick's expression softened as he began to lean in to me slightly.

I could feel his breath on my lips, as he stroked the hair in my face away, and tucked it behind my ear. Was he about to kiss me?

Suddenly, one of the logs fell over in the fireplace, directing our attention away from one another, interrupting our moment.

We scooted back from each other, realizing what we were about to do.

I cleared my throat nervously and reached over to check on the dryness of my clothes.

"Want me to put another log on?" Nick asked, blushing slightly.

"Uhm…actually my stuff's dry." I said, trying not to sound awkward.

He checked his clothes as well. "Mine too."

"I think I might call it a night. Want to be prepared for tomorrow." I replied.

"Yeah. Good idea. I'll be back there in a few minutes, after I get this put out."

I nodded.

I began to gather my dry, warm clothes and put them back in the bag, checking to make sure it was dry as well.

"Goodnight. Don't stay up too late." I said.

Nick smiled. "I won't. Night."


	6. Chapter 6

The next morning I woke up to Nick snoring softly next to me.

His head was positioned by my feet.

Obviously, we both felt a tad awkward after we almost kissed.

I stood up and began going through my stuff in my bag, looking for clothes since I was still wearing Nick's tee shirt.

I picked out my clothes and made my way quietly to the bathroom.

I changed quickly and made my way into the living room to get something to eat while I waited for Nick to get up.

After about a half hour, I heard footsteps making their way out into the living room.

I sat at the dining room table positioned towards the back half of the living room.

"Morning." I heard Nick's groggy voice call out behind me.

"Morning." I replied simply as I took a sip of my cold, black instant coffee.

"How long have you been up?" He asked as he walked into the kitchen.

"Uhm…about thirty or so minutes." I replied.

"You could have woken me up, you didn't have to wait on me."

"Oh. Well I didn't know what time you went to sleep so..." I trailed off.

"I stayed up awhile after you. I…couldn't sleep."

"Anxious?" I asked.

"Yeah. Something like that." He replied as he sat down several seats down from me.

We were engulfed with several moments of awkward silence as he began to eat breakfast.

"I put your shirt on the couch. Thanks for letting me wear it." I finally said, trying to make things less awkward.

"No problem." He smiled lightly.

More silence.

"Ready to go?" He asked me as he stood up and began to gather his things.

"Yeah." I replied.

We cleaned up and made our way outside.

It was pretty cloudy, though it looked like the rain would be holding off for a while.

I swung my bag on my back and took a deep breath in, straining my ears for any sounds.

We had been walking for fifteen minutes or so when we came up to a massive wall stacked up in front of us, reaching from one side of the street to the other.

The wall was made up of tires stacked on top of one another and reinforced with wood.

I inspected it as we got up closer.

The wall towered over both of us, reaching a good twelve feet or so if I had to guess.

"What the hell…?" Nick asked.

We both exchanged confused glances.

"Why would this be here?" Nick added.

"I….I don't know." I replied, pushing lightly on one of the protruding tires.

"Do you think there are people _alive_ in there?" Nick asked. "Was it made to keep other people out?"

"Possibly." I replied, a sense of worry spreading over me. "Or to keep something _in_."

We looked over at each other, both realizing how bad both scenarios could be.

"What should we do?" Nick asked, his voice shaking slightly.

"Well, we can definitely climb it and get in." I replied as I pointed to some purposely placed tires that resembled stairs off to the left side. "I'm just not sure what we'll find when we get in there."

We were silent for several moments.

"It's awful quiet for a whole community to be in there." Nick said. "It could have been placed here by the military. They did something pretty similar to my neighborhood back in LA."

"Yeah? How'd that work out?" I asked.

"Horribly." Nick laughed.

"I think we should go in there. We just need to be _extremely_ careful. But you're right. It's too quiet for there to be a huge group. It was probably a military thing left over."

Nick nodded. "Let's do it."

Nick began climbing the makeshift stairs, checking behind him to make sure I was making it okay.

There were steps on the other side as well. Nick walked them and then stood at the bottom reaching his hand up to help me down.

We paused and looked around. The neighborhood seemed pretty well maintained, given the circumstances. A little dirty, but everything was pretty normal looking still.

"We have to be super quiet, be on the lookout for anything." I whispered.

"Stay close." Nick whispered back.

We began walking deeper in the neighborhood, keeping our guard up at all times.

I was practically shaking I was so nervous.

I lagged slightly behind Nick, trying to keep a watchful eye on what might be creeping up behind us.

The deserted street seemed to stretch out endlessly in front of us.

It was an eerie feeling.

"Where is everyone?" Nick whispered as he stopped in the middle of the road.

"Maybe the military took the survivors with them." I replied. "Did something like that happen to your neighborhood?"

"You could say that." Nick laughed slightly. "Didn't work out so well. Military turned out to be complete assholes, who were only looking out for themselves."

"Doesn't surprise me. They vanished pretty quickly where I was once things got too hard to handle."

"It doesn't seem like that's quite what happened here…" Nick whispered as he looked around. "But _why_ would they leave? I mean it looks like they had it pretty well here. Plus if it was the military's doing, how did they manage to take all these people? It's a big neighborhood."

I shook my head. "Something doesn't add up."

"Nothing has added up since the infected took over." Nick replied.

"At least it seems to be empty." I said. "But still keep a look out."

"Do we check every house then?"

"No that will take too long." I replied. "I uhm…I know where we can find oil."

"You do? Where?" Nick asked surprised.

"One of my friend's, Sam…his parents had a boat."

"Was he…one of the friends you were with, when everything first went down?"

"Yes." I replied quietly. "He was."

I shifted uncomfortably, trying to hold back tears. No way was I about to cry in front of Nick.

"Cassie, we don't have to go there if…you know…it's too hard."

"No, no. We _have_ to. I know for a fact they will have gas. We don't have time to waste checking other houses. I know we'll find some there."

Nick paused and surveyed my face. "Alright. I'm with you."

"But if it gets too hard, just say the words and I'll do it alone." He added.

I nodded. "I'll be okay. But thanks."

"Lead the way." Nick replied.

We began walking towards a tall two story white house with black shutters.

I stood in front of it and stared, getting lost in my memories for several seconds.

I felt Nick's hand rest gently on my right shoulder. He gave it a tiny squeeze.

I looked up at him and we exchanged small smiles.

I gripped my knife tighter.

"I'm ready." I said.

Nick nodded and we made our way up onto the front porch.

I took a deep breath as he turned the doorknob.

It was unlocked.

He opened it slightly and turned back towards me. "Are you sure?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

He surveyed my face for several seconds before turning back towards the door.

He pushed it wide open and we stepped through.

It appeared to be empty.

I let out a huge sigh.

"Relieved?" Nick asked.

"Slightly disappointed." I replied. "I thought maybe they could still…"

"Hey, maybe they left. With the military." Nick said, trying to be optimistic.

"It doesn't matter." I snapped myself out of it, remembering what we were here for.

"Want me to check the place out?" He asked.

"No. I know where the oil is. I just want to get in and out as quickly as possible."

"Alright."

"Just keep an eye out." I replied.

"I got you covered." Nick said.

I held my knife tightly in my hand as I made my way towards the back of the house.

Their boat was parked in the backyard and I remember them keeping the extra oil in a small storage box in the side of the house.

I walked towards the sliding glass doors off of the kitchen that led to the small yard. I slid them open as quietly as I possibly could.

I looked back to see Nick walking around and staring at pictures on the wall.

I proceeded out the door and saw the covered boat.

I looked over to the left and saw the storage box.

There was a combination lock placed on the box.

Thank god I remembered the code to get in it.

"6…12…2." I whispered as I turned the knob to the numbers.

I pulled down and the lock clicked open.

I opened the box to find the oil.

"Thank god." I breathed.

I grabbed the red gas can and heard the swish of the oil inside.

I shut the storage box lid and made my way back inside the house.

Nick's back was towards me, he seemed to be holding something in his hands besides his weapon.

"Found it." I said, the excitement and relief making an appearance in my voice.

"Great." Nick said, less than excited.

"Ready to go?" I asked as I walked closer to him.

He spun around to me and I saw a picture frame in his hands.

He looked at me as he handed me the frame.

I grabbed it and saw a picture of me and Sam.

The picture was Sam kissing my cheek as I grinned cheerfully at the camera.

"Where did you find this?" I asked quietly, still staring at the picture.

"It was on the ground, by the stairs." Nick replied.

I was quiet. A million things racing in my mind, the memories of the night I lost everyone came flooding back to me.

Tears began to fall softly down my cheeks.

"Sam was his name?" Nick asked.

I nodded.

"Was he…we're you guys…together?" Nick asked.

I wiped my cheeks as I looked at the picture again.

"Uhm…yeah. Yeah. We were together." I replied.

I continued to stare at the picture, trying not to completely lose it. I wiped my face again.

"He was with you when…?" Nick trailed off.

"We should go." I said.

"Cassie…hey…it's alright." Nick said softly, noticing how upset I was.

"We need to go." I repeated.

I walked over to a nearby cabinet placed in the entry way.

I sat the picture upright on the surface of the cabinet.

I stared at it for several seconds as I traced my thumb lightly over Sam's face.

I wish we never came in this house.

It hurt too much.

I wiped the single tear falling from my eye and walked over towards the door.

"Ready?" I asked, trying to sound normal, my voice shaking slightly.

Nick stared at me, confused. "Yeah. Sure."

We walked out of the house and back onto the street.

"Hey." Nick called out after me. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm fine." I replied simply as I began to speed walk.

"Do you want to talk about it? It may make you feel better?"

"No. I'm fine." I called over my shoulder.

"Cassie, seriously we can talk about it. I'm here for you."

We continued to walk as I didn't respond.

"I know exactly what you're feeling. We can talk-"

"Nick, stop." I said as I stopped in my tracks in front of him. "There's nothing to talk about."

"You're not serious." Nick began. "This guy obviously meant _a lot_ to you. You must be having some….flashbacks of that night."

"Nick, cut it out! I mean it!" I snapped. "I don't want to do this!"

"I know you're upset and I'm just saying you can talk to me about this when you want to. I lost someone close to me that way too." Nick replied.

"You don't know how I lost him!"

"I was just taking an educated guess that it's similar to what I experienced."

"It doesn't matter anymore!" I yelled.

"Yes it does." Nick glared at me. "You need-"

"Stop! _Just stop_!" I started as I stared up at him. "Do you remember what I said last night? How your past doesn't matter to me? How I don't care what you did, or who you were, before we met?"

"Yes. I remember."

"It needs to go both ways for this to work." I paused. "So does it?"

Nick stared back at me.

"Cassie…"

"Yes or no, Nick. Answer me."

He nodded. "Yeah. Yeah it does."

"Good. Let's go." I replied as I began walking again.

"I just want you to know one thing." Nick's voice called out behind me.

I spun around and walked back over to where he was standing.

"Okay. What is it?" I asked.

"I'll always be here to listen, if you ever want to break that pact."

"Likewise." I replied.

"I'll always be here for you."

"That's something that's not really in your control anymore."

"As long as I'm here, I'll be here for you." Nick replied, his brown eyes piercing mine again.

I felt my heart flutter in my chest. It felt like warmth running through my veins, warming every cold ounce of me.

"I'm here for you too." I finally replied.

We were both silent for several moments, both trying to get a feel for the vibe between us.

Was he about to try and re-do our almost kiss from last night?

Here? _Now_?

"Cassie….I-"

Suddenly a distant rumble could be heard off in the distance.

"Shhh." I said, stopping Nick mid-thought. "I heard something."

"What was it?" Nick asked.

"I don't know…it was a rumbling or something."

Then the distinct sound of thunder came rolling in following a bright flash of light.

"Thunderstorm." Nick said, staring at the sky.

"All the more reason to hurry."

Nick nodded in return and we made our way back towards the giant tire wall.

We were walking for several minutes when Nick wandered off to the right.

He walked over to a parked car, which appeared to be filled with stuff.

"Check this out." Nick called over to me. "It's stuffed to the roof."

I walked over to him and the car and inspected it.

"We're a tad low on food and I can see boxes of canned stuff on the floor in the back." Nick said as he peered in the back window.

"Do we have time to search it?" He asked.

I looked up at the sky as another clap of thunder echoed out around us.

"Sure. But be quick okay?" I replied.

Nick nodded as he pulled on the driver's side door handle.

It didn't open.

He proceeded to check the remaining doors.

"It's locked." He said.

"It was worth a shot." I sighed.

"I can break in." Nick smirked.

I looked around. "Can you do it quietly?"

"Come on. That's like asking the infected if they like to eat people." Nick joked.

I smiled. "Get to it then."

Nick kneeled down on the ground by the driver's side door. He unzipped his backpack and pulled out a long, bent out wire hanger.

He began to slip it into the driver's window and work his magic.

"Having some trouble?" I asked after several moments of watching Nick's frustrated expression.

"This car is a pain in the ass to break in to. I can't get a good grip on the handle."

"Oh really? I thought you were some kind of lock picking ninja?" I teased.

He smiled at me briefly. "A ninja huh? I like the sound of that. Maybe you should call me that from now on."

"Get this car unlocked and we'll see." I joked.

We were silent while Nick continued to try and get the car open.

Suddenly a loud ringing and beeping hit our ears.

The car's alarm was going off.

"Shit!" Nick yelled. "Shit! Shit!"

"Get it off!" I shouted back. "Hurry!"

He struggled for several for minutes before he managed to get the door open.

The alarm's loud ringing finally came to a stop.

We stared at one another, unsure of what to say.

"I thought you said you could do it _quietly_! That was the complete opposite of quiet!"

"I'm sorry! I haven't tripped the alarm like that in years!"

"It's fine. Whatever. We don't have time to stand here and argue. We just let the entire surrounding area know we're here."

"Cassie, calm down. There's no one around." Nick replied.

"Yeah not before _that_ happened! You've literally woken up the dead!" I snapped.

"I said I was sorry! I didn't mean to do it!"

"Shut up!" I scolded.

"What? You've made your point. I'm a screw up."

" _Shut up and listen_." I replied as I stared seriously into Nick's eyes.

We could hear the distinct calls of the infected. They were moaning and screeching and they were getting closer.

We could hear the sound of shuffling, when suddenly they came into view.

A giant hoard of undead were coming out of the shadows beyond Sam's old house, and they were heading straight for us.

"Oh god!" I yelled.

"SHIT!" Nick screamed.

"GET THE STUFF!" I shouted at Nick.

He dove into the back seat and grabbed a small box full of canned goods.

He handed them to me as he flung his backpack back on his shoulders.

By this time the infected were right behind us, their arms outreached as their jaws snapped open and closed, hoping to get a bite of our flesh.

"Nick, let's go!" I yelled as I pulled him out of the back seat, where he had went in to grab more supplies.

"I found more gas!" He showed me another red gas can filled to the top.

"LETS GO, NOW!"

We were suddenly surrounded.

We started running back towards the wall of tires, staying just barely out of reach of the infected.

"KEEP RUNNING!" Nick shouted at me, as he took out an approaching infected man.

As if I had another choice, but to run.

We could finally see the wall.

It was like one of those dreams you have, where you're running and running towards something in the distance. And every time you think you've almost reached it, it's back off in the distance again. It's always just out of reach.

Except this wasn't a dream.

This was our reality.

And we finally actually reached the wall.

"Climb up!" Nick yelled. "Climb up first and I'll hand you the stuff!"

I nodded in return as I handed him the box of canned food.

I started climbing up the makeshift stairs as quickly as I could.

I got up to the top. "Hand me it!"

Nick hoisted the box up to me.

I grabbed it.

Then he handed me up one of the containers of gas.

It was heavy, but I held it the best I could.

"Come up!" I yelled as the infected were right behind him by this point. "Now!"

He held onto the fuller gas can of the two, and began to climb up towards me.

He made his way to the top as the giant horde of the infected surrounded the wall.

They groaned and reached out their hands to the sky.

Waiting to catch us if we fell. Welcoming us with open, dead arms.

"Let me climb down halfway and you can hand me the stuff!" Nick shouted.

"Yeah!" I yelled back.

He began to climb halfway down the other side.

He dropped the other gas can to the ground and opened up his arms for me to hand him the next item.

I handed him the other gas can.

He took it and leaned down to drop it gently.

I looked out over the horde below me.

And that's when I saw her.

Her milky eyes, gazing up at me.

Her dark hair matted.

The side of her neck, missing.

My heart immediately dropped to my stomach.

It was Sam's mother.

"No…" I whispered.

"Cassie, I'm ready!" Nick yelled up at me.

"No, no, no." I said as I continued to stare at her.

"Cassie! Come on!"

I felt my feet suddenly moving back down the tire stairs towards the horde.

"Nancy…" I sobbed, as tears started to run down my face.

I moved closer and closer towards her, her hands grabbing for my legs.

"Cassie, what the hell are you-" Nick said as he made his way back up to the top of the wall.

"CASSIE!" He yelled at me.

"She's…she's-" I said, in disbelief.

Suddenly, she grabbed my leg and I felt myself slipping downwards.

"NO! CASSIE!" Nick screamed.

The box of canned food slid out of my hands, as I tried to grab for my knife in my pocket.

Dead Nancy grabbed up my leg, trying to pull me down, so I could meet her new friends.

I felt Nick grab me under my arms and started pulling me up towards him.

I started kicking the nearby infected that noticed my scuffle with Nancy.

"I GOT YOU!" Nick yelled.

He gave me one last pull up the wall, as my leg fell out of her grip.

I was in shock.

I scurried back up, past Nick, to the top of the wall.

Nick turned around and got ready to climb back up towards me, when suddenly he slipped.

Several of the infected, grabbed on to his legs and started pulling him down.

I snapped out of my trance, immediately.

"NICK!" I screamed. I lunged down towards him and started pulling, as hard as I could.

I could feel him slipping out from my grip, as he was being pulled in the opposite direction.

"NICK, HOLD ON TO ME!"

He got one of his legs free and started kicking some infected in the face.

"CASSIE, JUST GO!" Nick yelled up at me as I held on to him.

"NO! HOLD ON!"

"CASSIE!" Nick yelled. "It's okay! It's okay! Just go!"

"NO, NICK! NO FUCKING WAY!"

I looked at his face, it was oddly calm.

I couldn't find a trace of sadness or fear anywhere in his eyes.

"You can let go." He said, loosening his grip slightly.

"HOLD ON TO ME! HOLD ON TO ME, DAMNIT! DON'T YOU DARE LET GO OF ME!"

"Thanks for helping me." He said. "Get back to my family, safely."

I felt him loosen his grip, almost fully, on my arms.

He started to slip.

"NO, NICK!" I yelled. "GOD DAMNIT! I TOLD YOU TO FUCKING HOLD ON!"

I let out a loud grunt as I used all of my strength.

I grabbed further down his arms and started pulling him up towards me.

I could feel his hands grab back on to my arms.

I pulled and pulled and finally I got him free.

He started walking up the steps again as we both went as fast as we could, to get down and to the other side.

I jumped down on to the street, from a few steps up.

I grabbed a can of gas, and looked back up to see Nick jumping down.

He grabbed the other container. And we started running.

We kept running and running, trying to get back to the house we had left only hours earlier.

I panted so hard as I tried to keep moving, tears streaming down my face.

I hadn't cried in what felt like forever.

Now I was basically sobbing.

"Keep going!" Nick shouted over at me.

The small yellow cottage finally came into view.

A huge wave of relief fell over me.

"Oh god." I sobbed as I took my final sprints towards the house, Nick behind me.

We ran up onto the porch and burst through the front door.

Nick slammed it behind him.

I flung my bag and the gas can to the ground and started sobbing harder than ever, trying to take in breaths as my lungs struggled to catch up.

Nick dropped his stuff as well, his brown eyes wide with panic.

I looked up at him as I trembled.

We locked eyes as I began to slow my breath, tears still silently falling from my eyes.

He looked at me, stunned from my crying.

"Hey, hey…Cassie, it's alright." He said softly.

"You almost died." I choked out.

"No, no I'm alright." He replied, trying to calm his voice but I could hear it shaking.

"You almost _died_ , Nick." I repeated, almost as if I was trying to come to terms with what happened.

"Cassie, I'm okay. It's okay."

I shook my head. "You _almost died for me_."

He nodded.

My legs began moving towards him, I didn't know what was happening.

I walked up to him and grabbed his face, kissing him.

I felt the taste of him, I could feel him jump with shock at what I was doing.

Hell, even I was shocked.

We slowly pulled away from one another.

He stared down at me and gently wiped the tears from my cheeks.

It felt like an electric shock ran through my whole body as he stroked my cheek.

"Cassie…" He started.

"Shhh." I replied as I started kissing him again.

"Cassie…what's…happening?" He managed to get out between kisses.

I pulled away from him. "Nick, shut up."

I started kissing him again for several moments.

He pulled away from me again, his eyes staring straight into mine.

"Are you sure about this?" He whispered to me.

I nodded. "Yes."

The moment that word left my mouth, he lunged in to me, kissing me with what felt like a hunger, like he needed me.

We began to deepen our kissing.

I ran my hands through his curly hair, pulling him in closer to me.

He broke away from my mouth and began kissing my neck gently.

I let out a small moan as he nipped at my tender skin.

He looked at me and smirked, before we began kissing again.

Our tongues searched each other's mouths, hungry for the taste of one another.

I pulled off his jacket, my mouth still attached to his.

He grabbed my waist and lifted me up, as I wrapped my legs around him.

He began to carry me down the hallway that led to a bedroom.

He kicked the door open wider and carried me into the room, laying me down on the bed.

He hovered above me as we continued to kiss.

He stood up and looked down at me.

We exchanged smiles and he began to slip off my shoes.

He bent down and lightly kissed my stomach just below my belly button. Then he unbuttoned my jeans and began to pull them off of my legs.

I sat up on the bed and slowly unbuckled his belt, followed by his jean's button.

They fell gently to the ground as he took off his shirt.

I grabbed the hem of my shirt and lifted it over my head, tossing it to the ground. I reached around to my back and unhooked my bra.

I took it off, exposing my breasts.

He took a long look at me.

"You're beautiful." He breathed.

I blushed.

He then began kissing me again, as I fell gently back down on the bed.

I felt our bare skin touch and felt how warm he was against me.

It felt so good to be so close to him, to feel his warmth.

He broke away from my lips again, kissing my collar bone gently.

He moved downward slowly, kissing various parts of my skin.

He gently cupped my left breast and began squeezing it lightly, as he continued to kiss down my body.

He kept kissing me until he reached the top elastic of my underwear.

He looked up at me again, almost looking for approval.

I bit my lip, answering his silent question.

He smirked again and stood up as he removed my underwear, leaving me completely naked.

I sat upright again and began to pull off his boxer briefs.

He pulled them all the way off and then bent down and stroked the few pieces of hair that hung in my face. I grabbed my hair elastic and let my hair out of my ponytail. It fell gently around my shoulders and back.

Nick kissed my shoulder and then back to my lips.

We kissed as we made our way closer to the top of the bed.

My heart was beating out of my chest. I couldn't believe what was happening.

And I couldn't believe how much I enjoyed what was happening.

I laid flat on my back as Nick assumed the position.

He hovered above me and looked down at me.

He lowered his head and gave me a gentle and tender kiss before he entered me.

My heart was racing now. There was no turning back after this and I didn't want to.

I gasped as we began to have sex.

Thunder clapped loudly outside, in coordination to our moans, almost like they happened at the same rhythm.

It was perfect.

He was alive and everything was really okay.

Everything would be fine.

We finished and I felt my heart still thumping in my chest.

Nick rolled off of me and laid next to me in the bed.

I could hear his slightly ragged breath.

"Wow." He breathed.

I started giggling, feeling lightheaded and slightly dizzy, from all the excitement.

He started to laugh lightly, a wide grin spread across his handsome face.

We laid there naked, both of us sweaty and our cheeks flushed.

He sat up on his elbows and faced me.

We stared at one another for several seconds, his deep brown eyes looking at me softly.

Another small smile came over his face, as he bit his lip gently.

I reached up and tucked a strand of his matted, brown wavy hair behind his ear.

I brushed the side of his cheek with my thumb as we continued to stare at one another, taking in every second of what had happened.

He leaned down and kissed me tenderly, the taste of his lips making me feel weak.

He broke away from me and kissed me softly on my forehead.

This really was perfection.

I had never felt more alive.

And I never wanted this moment to end.


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning, I awoke to the sun gently peeking in the window of the room I was in.

I yawned and rubbed my eyes sleepily.

I looked down at myself and noticed I was naked.

"Shit." I whispered as the memory of what happened came back to me.

I look over my shoulder and noticed that Nick wasn't in the bed with me.

I could hear some faint noises coming from the living room down the hall.

"Shit, shit, _shit_." I whispered to myself again.

What the hell was I thinking?

Why did I sleep with Nick?

I felt like I had a hangover without even getting drunk.

I had no desire to get up and face him, or the day for that matter, but I had to.

We had to get back to the boat and leave.

I couldn't just dwell on hooking up with Nick.

We needed to get going.

I stood up and got dressed.

Thank god Nick brought our bags in the room before we went to sleep last night, so I didn't have to awkwardly walk to the living room naked to get it.

I got dressed, grabbed my stuff and began to walk into the living room, bracing myself for how awkward it would be.

I walked in to see Nick with his back towards me, leaning over the dining room table.

I sat my bag down and he turned to look at me.

"Hey." He smiled sheepishly at me.

"Hey." I sighed.

We were silent for a few moments.

"Breakfast?" Nick asked as he moved from in front of the table, revealing a small breakfast set up for two.

He had two plates with an assortment of breakfast bars on them and two glasses filled with water and lemons.

He noticed me looking at the table.

"I uhm…I know it's not much but you know…the apocalypse…" He smirked playfully.

"Uh..uhm…" I stammered, not knowing what to say.

"You don't like it?" He frowned.

"No, no. It's not that. Just-" I paused, nervously fidgeting. "We should just get going."

"Oh." He started. "Oh, yeah you're right."

More awkward silence.

"Sorry." He added.

"No it's fine." I said quietly.

"We can just take it to go then."

I nodded.

He began cleaning up the table and handed me a breakfast bar.

I smiled lightly and pulled my jacket on.

"Are you ready to go?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, I guess so." I replied.

We grabbed our stuff and made our way to the front door.

"I'm sad to go. This place feels kind of…sacred." Nick said behind me.

I stopped walking, instantly knowing what he was meaning.

"Yeah? How so?" I asked as I spun around to face him, afraid of what he might say.

"Because we…" Nick trailed off as he stared at me. "Found the oil."

"Right, right. The oil." I replied. "Well that _is_ why we came here so..."

"Right." Nick replied simply.

I gave him a small smile and turned to leave.

"Cassie?" Nick asked.

I turned around once more and saw him peering down at me, his crazy wavy hair peeking out around his ears and neck.

I stared for several seconds at his perfectly sculpted face.

"Thank you." He finally said, his deep brown eyes locked on mine.

"For what, exactly?" I asked.

"For doing all of this. For helping me and my family." Nick replied.

He paused briefly. "For staying."

I felt my heart beating quickly in my chest.

"You don't have to thank me." I replied. "I'm glad I stayed."

A full smile spread across his face and I felt my heart flutter in my chest.

What the hell was happening?

"Let's get going, yeah?" I finally said.

Nick nodded. "I'm right behind you."

Later that evening we made our way to the first house we stayed in, the halfway point.

We checked out the house and made our way up into the bedroom.

We had barely talked, only to warn one another of an approaching infected.

Obviously things were a tad awkward since we slept together the previous night.

Neither of us knew what to say on the matter.

We walked into the bedroom.

I stood at the foot of the bed, staring, wondering what was going to happen.

If _it_ was going to happen again.

Should we both sleep in the bed together?

Was it too weird now?

"Help me push the dresser?" Nick asked.

I turned to him. "Uhm…uh."

Guess my question was answered.

"You're going to sleep in here tonight?" I asked.

Nick looked at me, a shocked expression on his face. "I was planning on it…is that okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah. I guess."

"Do you… _not_ want me to sleep in here?" He asked cautiously.

"No, no. It's not that. I just- I didn't know-" I stammered over my words.

"It's just…awkward." I finally said.

"Yeah. I've noticed." Nick replied. "But it doesn't have to be awkward. We can…you know…talk about what happened."

"I'm not sure what to say." I replied.

"Do you _want_ to talk about it?"

"Yes and no."

"Well, help me push the dresser over and then we can talk- or _not talk_ about it." Nick said.

"But-"

"If you don't want me to sleep next to you, I can grab the kid mattress from across the hall and sleep on the floor. But I'm not leaving you alone in this room. I'm keeping you safe, no matter how awkward things are between us. Okay?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Okay."

"I'll go get the mattress." He turned and left, returning several moments later dragging a small, toddler sized mattress behind him.

He plopped it down next to the side of the bed I slept on last time and threw a small blanket and pillow on top of the bed.

"Alright, help me push." He said as he walked over to the dresser.

I shut the bedroom door and began helping him scoot the dresser until it blocked the door completely.

He gave me a small smile and began to take off his jacket.

"If you want to talk, I'm all ears." He said as he took a seat on the edge of the bed. "Corn?"

He pulled out a can of corn and two plastic spoons.

I shook my head no. My stomach was in knots and I couldn't bring myself to eat anything.

"Cassie, you should eat something."

"I'm fine."

"If you want something else, I have other choices."

"No. I'm fine."

He stared at me for several seconds. "Alright. I'll save you some."

He opened up the can of corn and began eating. I sat down in the window sill. We sat in silence for what felt like forever.

I stared out the window, trying to process my thoughts.

My mind was racing. I had no idea how to handle any of this.

"You sure you don't want any?" Nick asked, breaking the silence.

"No thanks." I replied simply.

He closed the lid on the corn and placed it on the bedside table next to where I would be sleeping.

"Is this how it's going to be from now on?" Nick asked as he sat back down on the edge of the bed.

I sighed. "I honestly don't know."

"Why _is_ it like this exactly?" He asked.

I could feel his eyes on me as I faced towards the window.

"Did I do something wrong?" He asked.

I looked over at him. "No, you didn't do anything wrong."

"Was it…was it not… _good_?"

"No, no. It _was_ good. That's the issue." I replied.

"I'm confused. It was good, and that's the problem?"

"Yes. It wasn't supposed to happen. And it did. And I liked it." I said. "And that's a _huge_ problem."

"It wasn't supposed to happen?" Nick asked, looking as confused as ever. "What the hell does that mean?"

"It means exactly what I said. It wasn't supposed to happen."

"But _it did_ , Cassie. It did happen." He replied.

We were both silent for several minutes.

"Do you regret it? Do you wish it never happened?" Nick asked, his eyes practically burning a hole in me.

"What?" I asked.

"Do you regret it?"

"I…I don't know."

Nick scoffed and hung his head down, shaking it slightly. "You don't know. Well that's just fucking great, isn't it?"

He looked up at me, he was clearly mad or frustrated. Probably both.

"You know, it was _you_ who kissed _me_ , right?"

"I know. I kissed you first." I replied.

"I was fine, trying to control myself around you, trying to fight what I was feeling. I was doing fine pretending that I wasn't starting to have feelings for you." Nick started. "And then _you kissed me_. And all those feelings I had came rushing out of me, whether I wanted them to or not. And I…I asked you if you were sure. I tried to stop it and make sure you were okay with what was happening."

He paused. "And you said yes."

"I know, I know. I'm sorry." I pleaded. "I made a mistake."

"You made a mistake?!" Nick said, as he raised his voice and stood up.

He towered over me, practically demanding we talk about this.

"Yes! Okay?! Yes! I made a mistake!" I shouted as I stood up. "Those things you were feeling towards me, I was feeling them too! And I was trying to suppress them, just like you were! And then the hoard came out, and you almost died! And I was scared that I was going to lose you, and you'd never know how I felt about you! So I kissed you and I let my guard down and we slept together! And now I've ruined everything! It will never be the same between us again. It's ruined."

"You're being so irrational right now, it's insane!" Nick yelled. "So that's it?! You just get to have sex with me and tell me you care about me and then push me away afterwards, like I don't even matter to you?!"

"Yes! That's _exactly_ what I get to do!"

"Why?! Why are you insisting on staying away from me?! After all we've been through, you think you get to just forget about me?!"

I was silent as tears gently ran down my face.

"Answer me, dammit! I deserve an answer!" Nick roared.

"I can't let this go any further." I said quietly.

"Why?! Why the hell not?!"

"Because!" I shouted.

"Because why?!"

I was silent.

"Because _why_ , Cassie?! Tell me why you're doing this!"

"Because I can't keep falling in love with you!"

He looked at me as his brown eyes widened with shock from the words I said to him.

"I can't _be_ in love with you, Nick! I lost someone I loved, in the worst way possible, and it _destroyed_ me! I can't go through that again!" I paused. "I can't risk losing you."

"You're…you're falling _in love_ with me?" Nick asked.

"Don't act so surprised." I snapped as I wiped my tears off of my cheeks.

"Cassie…I'm falling in love with you too." Nick stared. "And I'm done trying to hide it."

"We _can't_ do this, Nick. What we did, it stops now." I replied.

"I know you loved Sam. And I know you lost him." Nick started. "I loved someone and lost them too. The same way you lost Sam. I know how that feels. I know what you went through."

"If you know what I went through, then why would you want to go through it all over again?" I asked.

"I lost my girlfriend at the very beginning of all of this. I woke up and found her. She tried to eat me alive. I was already in a dark place, thanks to the drugs. And losing her was hard." Nick paused. "But I had drugs to get me through it. And I realized how easy it was to get lost in being high and not having to deal with her death. So I get that you're scared of what might happen to us. I'm scared too. If I lose you, I'll have nothing to numb the pain. And that scares the _shit_ out of me."

"Then you should know why us getting involved is a bad idea."

"But that's not going to happen with us. I won't let it happen."

"It will, Nick. It may not be now, or tomorrow, or next week. But it will happen. There's nothing we can do about it. Eventually, this world will catch up with us."

"So you're going to let the fact that we will die someday, get in the way of us being together?"

"Yes. I can't let myself fall in love with you any more than I already am, only to watch you get ripped away from me. I can't go through that again. This time I know what's coming. I can prevent us from getting hurt again. I'm trying to protect us."

"I know you are. But we have something great between us. The love we have, the way we care about one another, we can't just ignore that. Not at a time like this." Nick paused. "I won't ignore it. Not anymore."

"No. _We can't do this_." I shook my head.

"We can use this love to make us stronger, to make us fight for our lives harder. We'll be fighting for each other, not just for ourselves." Nick replied.

"This world has no room for love anymore."

"So let's change that." Nick replied as he gently grabbed my hands. "Hmm? Me and you."

"We can't." I replied quietly.

" _Yes we can_." He said. "We can at least try."

I shook my head. "I don't want to try. I want to survive. And I can't let anything get in the way of that."

Nick's expression changed. He was clearly hurt by what I said.

"Fine. If that's how you feel, then fine." He paused briefly. "You may be giving up, but I want you to know that I'll never stop trying."

"Good luck." I replied quietly, as I let go of his hands, feeling like my chest was on fire.

It hurt me so bad to say those words to him, to act like I didn't care anymore.

I was falling for him and it killed me to try and forget those feelings.

I tried to hold back tears as I made my way over to my side of the bed.

I unzipped my bag and pulled out the candles, placing them on the night stand and lighting them.

I heard the crackle of the walkie in Nick's pocket.

"Nick? Nick you there?" I heard his mom's voice call out.

He pulled it out. "Yeah. Hey mom. I'm here."

His voice cracked slightly as he spoke, revealing that he was upset.

"Are you guys alright?" Madison said.

"We're…we're fine, mom. Everything's fine."

"Are you at the halfway point yet?"

"Yeah. We're in the house." He replied.

"Okay. So everything's good? Got the oil?"

"Yep. We got it. It's safe and sound."

"Great. Everything's ready for you guys back here. Strand has it all fixed and good to go. All we need is the gas."

"Yeah great." Nick replied.

"Okay honey. Get some rest. We will see you guys tomorrow. Be careful."

"Of course. See you tomorrow."

"Love you, Nick."

Nick paused as he rubbed his eyes. "Uh yeah. Love you too. Night."

"Goodnight. Keep Cassie safe."

Nick and I exchanged glances. "Always."

My heart dropped to my stomach.

I felt horrible, worse than I had in a long time.

He turned off the walkie and put in his backpack.

"I'm going to bed." Nick said simply as he walked over to the mattress on the floor. He took off his shoes and jeans.

"Nick, you don't have to sleep on that shitty bed."

"No, no. It's fine. I've slept on worse." He climbed onto the too small mattress and pulled the blanket over himself as he rolled over, his back towards me. "Goodnight."

I stared at him, feeling tears starting to fall from my eyes. "Goodnight."

I felt like I had made the biggest mistake of my life.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning I awoke to an empty bedroom. I couldn't hear anything. The world was quiet. More so than usual.

I got dressed and grabbed my things, making my way downstairs.

I entered the living room and glanced around.

No sign of Nick.

My heart started to quicken.

Maybe he actually did leave me this time.

Maybe he finally set me free, what I had been asking for all this time.

I heard a faint sigh coming from the kitchen.

I walked around the corner and saw Nick standing in front of the large window over the sink.

His back was towards me as he stared blankly out the window.

I walked closer to him, clearing my throat to make my presence known.

He spun around and stared at me.

I smiled sheepishly at him, trying to get a feel for what emotion he was in.

He gave me a quick, small smile before his mouth pressed into a hard line, a frown almost.

He turned back around and faced the window.

"Uhm…I'm ready." I said quietly.

He was silent for a few moments, still staring out the window.

He let out a sigh.

"Alright." He replied simply.

He moved from the window and picked up his backpack, swinging it over his shoulder.

He walked past me, not saying anything.

Great. He was basically ignoring me.

I deserved it, after what I said last night.

He was clearly hurt.

I followed behind him as he opened the front door.

We walked in silence, only telling one another of a passing infected that we took care of promptly.

My stomach roared as I trailed behind Nick.

I ignored it and kept walking, trying to get back to the boat on the schedule we had set.

My stomach continued to growl, and I finally gave in and decided to eat something.

I swung my bag around to my front, as I continued to walk.

I began to search for a breakfast bar, but was having no such luck.

"Dammit." I whispered.

"Hold up a second." I called out after Nick.

He stopped walking and looked back at me.

"Searching for food." I added.

I dug my hands towards the bottom of the bag, pushing past my clothes and other supplies. I rummaged around for several minutes.

I felt the presence of Nick approaching me.

"Here." He said as I saw him outstretch his hand to me.

I looked and saw a chocolate chip granola bar.

"Is that the last one?" I asked.

"Does it matter?" Nick shrugged.

"That depends." I replied.

"Depends on what?"

"If you're hungry or not." I said, staring hard up at him.

"You have it." Nick said, his brown eyes staring down at me.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Just take the damn bar, Cassie." Nick breathed.

I stared at him, trying to find his emotions in his eyes.

"Fine." I grabbed it from his hand.

He turned around and began walking again.

I zipped up my bag and swung it back on my shoulders, following Nick.

"I was trying to look out for you, you know." I said.

"Yeah, I got that. You made that perfectly clear to me last night." Nick replied as he glanced briefly over his shoulder at me.

"I was talking about offering you the granola bar." I replied.

"Oh. Thanks." Nick replied shortly.

"Are you pissed at me or something?"

"Nope." Nick said.

"Don't lie to me." I replied.

"Now why would I do a thing like that?" Nick said, sarcasm in his voice.

"Jackass." I mumbled under my breath.

Nick stopped in his tracks. I looked up to see him walking back to me.

"Seriously?" Nick asked.

"Wait you-"

"Yeah. I heard you." Nick spat.

"What do you want from me, Nick?" I asked. "Hmm? What do you want me to say to you, to make this all better?"

"I think you said plenty last night."

"Oh okay. So you _are_ pissed at me." I replied.

"Yeah. Maybe I am." Nick said, obviously getting more heated.

"So then, don't beat around the damn bush. Just come out and say it. Tell me what's _really_ bothering you."

"You're what's bothering me." Nick replied.

"How? I've barely even said anything to you today!"

"Because, you think you can just talk to me the way you did last night and I'm supposed to be okay with it? Like I'm supposed to go back to my usual self overnight?"

"I didn't _do_ anything wrong! I told you the truth, not what you wanted to hear! Maybe you're just not used to people telling you how they really feel!"

"No. You know what? I'm not used to people telling me how they feel. Want to know why? Because nothing good ever happens when you tell someone how you actually feel." Nick paused. "Or at least that's how it goes with you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I snarled.

"It means that I made a mistake last night, telling you how I really felt about you. You're not who I thought you were." Nick replied.

"No, Nick. I'm not who you thought I was. I'm a person who wants to survive, not let this get in the way."

"Let what get in the way?!"

"Let _you_ get in the way!" I yelled. "Okay? I'm not letting you distract me from what's really going on! My focus doesn't need to be on some relationship that will never go anywhere!"

He looked at me in disbelief from the words I just let come out.

"Don't look at me like that!" I started. "Wake up, Nick! Look at the world we live in now! Relationships are a waste of time!"

"How can you think like that?! How can you think that just because the world changed, that everyone on the planet has to completely change with it?!"

"Because _we do_!" I yelled. "We _have_ to accept and adapt to what the world really is now! If we don't, we won't make it!"

"We're making it _right now_! We've both made it this far without having to change who we are! Why give in to it now?" Nick asked.

"Because, we have bigger problems to worry about, bigger issues that need to be solved." I replied. "Us being together doesn't solve anything, it only creates more problems."

"This is why I wasn't talking to you." Nick said. "Nothing matters to you anymore. The only thing you care about is whether or not you're going to stay alive."

"What's wrong with that? That's how you need to be now!"

"No. It's not." Nick said. "You may be alive, but you're not living."

I hung my head down, realizing that he did have a slight point, but I wasn't changing my mind.

"Nick…"

"I'm not giving in to what you think are the world's new rules. How I feel about situations and relationships doesn't have to change. I can still be who I've always been, I can still feel what I've always felt. I can't change who I really am. Not at a time like this." Nick said.

"Neither can I." I replied, feeling defeated.

"I wish you'd see the world how I see it." Nick added, his eyes softening as he looked down at me.

"I wish I did too." I practically whispered.

"The only thing I want, is for you to be safe." Nick said. "And if that means being apart, then I'll suck it up and do it."

"I'm still here for you, Nick. Just because we aren't together, doesn't mean I don't care about you." I replied.

"I know, I know. You want to protect us from getting hurt." Nick said. "But losing you now, wouldn't be any easier than losing you ten years from now."

"Ten years from now seems like two days in this world." I started. "Things have changed. And I doubt they will ever go back to the way they were. This is the new normal. Relationships and feelings have to take a back seat."

"I'll always protect you, even if it only gives me two extra days." Nick said as he stared deep into my eyes.

My heart fluttered.

"I'll always protect you too." I replied.

We were silent for several seconds.

"So this is it then?" Nick breathed.

"I guess so." I replied as I nodded.

We stared at one another for several moments as Nick slowly began to lean in towards me.

His right hand reached up and gently cupped the side of my face.

I felt like an electric shock ran through my whole body, as I breathed in the moment we were having.

His lips brushed up against mine as he began to kiss me.

I didn't fight it.

I kissed him back, taking in every second of what would be our last kiss.

I didn't want him to stop.

He slowly pulled partly away from me and gave me a small, sad smile.

He rested his forehead gently on mine, as he took a deep breath in, slowly releasing it.

He stared into my eyes for a moment before he lowered his hand resting on my cheek and stood upright.

He then turned around and began walking.

I stayed put in that spot for what felt like forever.

All of my thoughts were scurrying around in my brain, taking over any other thoughts I had.

It was so hard to watch Nick walk away from me.

Even though we were both going to the same place, it felt different than when we left.

I watched him for several more seconds, before I snapped back and realized what was really the important task at hand.

I jogged slightly to catch up with him, although I hung back, not walking directly beside him.

I could feel the distance between us, no matter how close I walked to him.

I would never be that close again.

We would never be that close again.

And it killed me.

We continued to walk in silence, killing the stumbling infected as they approached us along our journey.

We could see the boat not far away from us.

I heard the familiar cracking of the walkie in Nick's pocket.

"Nick! Nick!" I heard Madison's voice hiss.

Nick stopped walking as he fished out the walkie.

I stopped and flung my bag onto the ground and began to get out a water bottle.

"Nick!" I heard her voice call, more frantically.

"Yeah. Mom. I'm here. What's up?" Nick replied.

"Nick! Listen to me!" Madison started. "Do not come back to the boat! Do you hear me?! Don't come back to the boat!"

Nick's eyes widened as I froze.

"Mom? What are you talking about?!"

"Whatever you do, don't come to the boat! Stay where you are! Find somewhere safe! Hide!"

"Mom! What's happening?! What's wrong with the boat?!" Nick yelled into the walkie.

"Nick, honey I love you! Just take Cassie and hide! Don't question me! Stay away from the boat!" Madison said, her voice cracking.

"Mom, please! Tell me what's going on!" Nick pleaded.

"I love you. Just don't-"

Madison's voice cut off mid-sentence, followed by some brief noises we couldn't make out.

I flung my bag on my back and walked over to Nick.

"Mom?!" Nick asked.

"MOM?!" He screamed into the walkie.

We looked at each other, confused and scared at what just happened.

"What the hell was that?!" I asked Nick.

"I have no fucking idea. We have to get to the boat! Something's wrong!"

Suddenly we heard the walkie crackle.

"I know what you did." A deep man's voice called out to us through the walkie.

My blood went cold. I felt the color drain from my face as I realized whose voice that was.

My heart pounded in my chest.

"I know you're there." The man said. "Cassie."

Nick looked over at me in shock, the color drained from his face as well.

"What? Suddenly neither of you have anything to say? Come on, let's chat."

I trembled, feeling like I might pass out, or piss my pants.

" _Come on_! We always had the best talks, Cass. I know you miss me."

Nick and I looked at one another as I shook my head no to stop him from saying anything, while we continued to listen.

"You have some nice friends here, Cassie." The man said. "It'd be such a shame if you never got to see them again."

I grabbed the walkie from Nick.

"What the hell do you want?" I spat into the walkie, my hand shaking so badly that I struggled to keep the button pressed in to speak.

"You know what I want." His voice said, low and cold.

Nick looked like he was about to throw up.

"Cut the shit, Craig!" I shouted. "What the fuck do you want?!"

"I want what's mine."

"You can have the damn boat! Just let the people on it go! Unharmed! Take the fucking boat!"

The man, named Craig, laughed. "I don't want the boat. I came back here because something of mine was taken from me. And it's time for it to come home. Right where it belongs."

"What the fuck does he want?! Do you know what he's talking about?!" Nick panicked.

"It's time to stop playing games, Cassie. It's time for you to come home." Craig said.

"I told you they'd come for me." I said to Nick.

"No! NO! You're not going with him!" Nick shouted.

"What the hell do you expect me to do, Nick?! They have your family hostage!"

"No! No fucking way!"

"He will _kill them_ , Nick! He's not playing around! I have to do this or your entire family will die! Do you get that?!"

"No! Cassie, you can't go back with them!"

"Talking it over with your new little friend, Cassie?" Craig's voice interrupting our conversation.

"There has to be another way! You can't just give up and go back with them! After all you went through to get away!" Nick shouted.

"Do you think I have another choice?!" I yelled at Nick.

"I'm not letting you do this, Cassie!" Nick said.

"I'm saving your damn family! I _have_ to go back with him!"

"Tick tock, Cassie. They're running out of time…" Craig said.

Suddenly we heard someone in the background of the walkie scream.

I raised the walkie up to my mouth when suddenly I felt Nick's arms wrapped around me.

He had my arms pinned by my sides and I couldn't press in the button to speak to Craig.

"NICK! LET GO!" I screamed franticly.

"YOU'RE NOT LEAVING WITH HIM!"

I squirmed to get free of his grip.

I raised my arm up holding the walkie when Nick smacked it straight out of my hand.

The walkie went flying and landed with a thud several feet away from where we were.

Nick still had a hold of me.

"NICK!" I screamed out in frustration.

We could hear more screaming coming from the walkie.

I pulled my arm up as far as I could and jammed my bent elbow into Nick's ribs.

He let out a grunt and loosed his grip on me.

I managed to get out of his arms as he bent over in pain.

I ran over to where the walkie was, falling to the ground in the process.

I snatched up the walkie and pressed the button.

"STOP!" I screamed at the walkie. "Stop! Please!"

"Ahh, finally. A response." Craig said.

"I'll come back with you."

"Cassie! NO!" Nick yelled.

"On one condition!" I yelled at Craig.

"I'm all ears, darling." Craig replied.

"You leave them alone and you let them go. All of them. Including the one I'm with."

Craig laughed. "Oh now, what's the fun in that?"

"I'm serious, Craig! If there's one fucking mark on them, the deal is off!"

There was silence for several moments.

"Deal." Craig's voice finally said.

"Cassie, _please don't do this_!" Nick pleaded.

"I'll be there as fast as I can." I spoke into the walkie.

"I'm looking forward to our reunion." Craig replied. "See you soon."

"Please, I can't let you go back with him!" Nick said.

"Nick, listen to me!" I shouted. "I'm not going anywhere."

"But you just said…"

"I know what I said." I replied. "But I'm not going with him…not without a fight."

"So, you lied to him?" Nick asked.

"Of course I lied. How else was I supposed to get him to keep your family safe until we get there?"

"Do you have a plan?"

"Somewhat." I replied.

" _Somewhat_?" Nick asked. "If this guy is as dangerous as your say he is, you better come up with something better than somewhat."

"Look." I started. "I'm going to try my best to end this. For good. But I need you to know, that if it gets too complicated, the only choice is for me to go back with him."

Nick opened his mouth in protest.

" _Please_! Please, Nick. Promise me that you won't interfere with that. I need to know you understand the plan." I pleaded.

Nick shook his head. "I can't just sit back and watch you get hauled off back to hell!"

"I have to keep your family safe. I got you all involved in this and I'm not breaking my promise. I told you I'd always protect you. That's exactly what I'm doing."

"I promised you the exact same thing! And I'm not letting you get in the way of that!"

"I'll be fine. I swear to you, I'll be fine. I'll be able to get away, it just might not be with you." I replied.

Nick was silent, trying to process everything.

"I'm not giving up without a fight. I can assure you that. But if that fight gets too far, and you and your family are in danger, I'm giving in. And I'm leaving with Craig. And you need to grab your family and get the hell out of here. That's always been the plan, Nick. Promise me you'll let me handle this, whichever way it goes."

More silence from Nick.

" _Nick_!" I yelled. "Promise me."

He was silent for several more moments.

"I promise." He croaked out.

I let out a huge sigh of relief. "Thank you." I replied as I stared up at him.

" _I can do this_. I swear, you and your family will be safe." I reassured him as I noticed how shook up he was about all of this.

"You mean _we_ can do this. I'm right behind you." Nick replied. "And don't protest. I'm an addict, remember? I've done way more dangerous things in the past."

"I never thought you couldn't help me. I just don't want you to risk it all over me."

"Too late." Nick said as he gave me a weak smile.

I returned the smile as I wrapped my arms around his body, embracing him.

He hugged me back, both us of worried and nervous over what we were about to walk in to.

We finally let go of each other.

"Let's go." Nick said.

I nodded in return and we began making our way to the boat.


	9. Chapter 9

We made it to a good vantage point, several yards away from the boat.

I swung my bag around and started going through it, pulling out my pair of binoculars.

I held them up to my eyes, and began searching the boat.

"What's happening?" Nick asked.

"I can see…your family." I replied. "They're…tied up. In the living room."

"Can you see each person? Is everyone there?"

"Yes. Everyone's there."

I scanned the rest of the boat that I could see.

"He's alone?" I said. "Wait, Craig came _alone_?"

"He's by himself? That's good right?" Nick asked.

I nodded. "It means that he knows how strong your group is. He doesn't want to risk losing anyone else."

"Or he's just an overly confident dick, who thinks he can take all of us by himself." Nick replied, bitterly.

"Shit." I said as I looked back through the binoculars. " _Shit_. He brought Kerry and Levi with him."

"There's _others_?" Nick asked, his voice shaking slightly.

I lowered the binoculars and stared at him. I could see him panicking beneath the surface.

"Hey, look at me." I said.

Nick looked over at me, worry written all over his face.

"You don't have anything to be scared of." I said. "We can do this."

Nick nodded. "I'm going to try my hardest."

"And that's why I know we can win." I gave Nick a reassuring smile.

"Got a plan yet?" He asked, as he grabbed the binoculars to look for himself.

"Yeah. I think so."

"Tell me what to do, and I'll do it." Nick said as he smiled lightly at me.

"I need you to follow my lead. I know Craig. And I know how he operates." I paused. "Just follow along with me, got it?"

"Yeah. I got it." Nick replied.

"We can do this." I repeated.

"Can we end this for good?" Nick said, gaining confidence back in his voice.

I nodded. "We end this for good."

"I'm ready when you are." Nick replied.

We stood up and made our way to the boat.

It was now or never.

And I was ready for this to be over, once and for all.

We reached the boat.

I looked over at Nick as he looked back at me.

"Ready?" I asked.

Nick nodded. "Lead the way."

"Remember, follow my lead."

"Always." Nick replied.

I took in a deep breath as we walked down the dock to the boat.

"Nick!" I heard Madison's muffled voice, trying to call out, as we made our way into the living room.

Craig spun around as his eyes landed on me.

I was trying not to show how badly I was shaking, I was so nervous for what was about to happen.

"Cassie!" Craig beamed at me. "So nice of you to finally show up!"

"I told you I'd be here." I replied.

"Look, look!" Craig said, as he pointed to everyone tied up on the couches. "Everyone's here! And they're all unharmed, just like you asked."

I looked around at them, feeling their panic. They were all tied up, with pieces of duct tape covering their mouths.

"Do we still have our deal?" He asked.

"Even better." I replied, as I pulled out the gun Nick and I had taken with us, from my pocket.

I turned to the side to face Nick and pointed the gun straight at his face.

"Give me your weapons." I spat at Nick.

"What?"

"Give me your damn weapons!"

Nick's eyes widened as he realized what was happening.

"Now!" I yelled at him, shoving the gun closer to his face.

He looked stunned as he took off his backpack and began to take out the few knives he had. He dropped them to the floor and put his hands up slowly.

The others watched in horror, as Alicia let out a muffled scream.

"Cassie…"

"Shut up." I hissed.

"Cassie, don't do this!"

"Shut the fuck up, Nick." I said. "Turn around."

Nick turned slowly, so that his back was towards me.

I place the gun in between his shoulder blades. "Move to the chair."

He began walking towards an arm chair.

"Sit down." I said, as I shoved the gun into his skin.

I slid the gun upwards, and aimed it at the back of his head, as he began to lower himself into the chair.

"Cassie, _please don't do this_." Nick pleaded.

"Shut up, or I'll blow your fucking head off." I said.

Tears started streaming down Madison's face, as she watched me threaten her son.

"Tie him up." I said to Craig.

"You heard the lady!" Craig said to one of his followers, Levi. "Tie the boy up!"

Levi grabbed some rope and began to tie Nick up, as I still pointed the gun at his head.

"Cassie, are you doing, what I think you're doing?" Craig asked me.

"What the fuck does it look like?" I asked.

"It looks like, you're turning on your new friends."

I laughed briefly. " _Friends_? Please. These people were merely my next conquest. You know me better than to have friends."

"I must say, I am impressed." Craig smiled at me. "You come on this boat, kill Johnson and Stevens to gain their trust, tell them you'll help them get away, and then turn on them in the end."

"You forgot about the part where I got one of them to fall in love with me." I replied, as I shoved the end of my gun into the back of Nick's head.

Craig laughed cheerfully. "This is fantastic. I knew I chose you for a reason. I should have known I could always count on you."

"Of course." I replied. "Anything for you."

"What happens next?" Craig asked.

"I think you know." I smiled at him.

"Did you find where they keep them all?" He asked.

I nodded. "Downstairs. Last door on the right. It's full. Take it all. Leave them with nothing."

"God damn, this is the best day!" Craig said as he clapped his hands together, excitedly.

"Go get the stuff. I'll stay up here." I said. "Watching my _friends_ scared, pathetic faces, is giving me the rush that I crave."

"You got it, darling." Craig smiled. "Let's go."

He began making his way down the stairs, followed by the other two men.

They were out of sight when I lowered my gun.

I bent over Nick's shoulder as he flinched slightly.

"This was my plan to get us out." I whispered quickly in his ear, as I began untying the rope around his hands.

" _This_ was your plan?! You fucking scared the shit out of me!" Nick replied, as I got him free.

"I told you to follow my lead. Well done."

Nick stood up from the chair as I handed him one of his knives.

"You're a genius." He smiled down at me. "I really thought you were double crossing us."

"Thanks. Now help me free your family. We don't have much time."

Nick and I both began cutting everyone free.

"This was my plan. Sorry if I scared you." I whispered, loud enough so everyone could hear me.

I didn't have time to fully apologize to everyone. They would be coming back upstairs any second.

"Alicia, Chris, Ofelia, you guys go hide!" I whispered to them. "Go! Go now!"

They tried to protest, but Madison and Travis pushed them in the direction of the stairs that led up to Strand's captain's quarters.

I quickly grabbed everyone's weapons that Craig had taken from them, and started handing them out.

"If you want to also go, it's fine. I can do this on my own."

"No. We're not leaving you." Madison replied.

I looked around to see everyone clutching their weapons, standing their ground, ready to help me fight.

I felt so grateful and lucky to have these people's support.

"Nick, you can go." I whispered to him.

He shook his head. "No way."

"You sure?" I asked.

Nick grabbed my hand. "I've never been so sure of anything in my life."

I smiled up at him briefly.

"Everyone, split up. I need you all to cover the exits. Take them out. All of them." I started. "Nick and I will stay in here. Good luck."

Everyone nodded in return, before quietly and quickly exiting the room.

I could hear Craig making his way back up the stairs.

"Just grab them all!" He yelled at the other men.

Nick and I exchanged quick, reassuring glances, as we both gripped our guns.

Craig entered back into the room we were in, stopping and staring at Nick and I in shock.

I aimed my gun at Craig, my eyes staring at him hard.

"What's this?" He asked, his voice low.

"It's me, ending this thing for good." I replied.

"Cassie, Cassie, Cassie." He began. "And I thought you were doing so good."

"I _am_ doing good. I'm making it so that you can NEVER do this to anyone again."

He laughed. "Oh really?"

He began walking closer to me. "And just how are you going to do that? Hmm? You and your little boyfriend, going to take me down?"

"I'm giving you a choice. You either get the fuck off this boat, and we never have to see each other again."

"Or?" He asked.

"Or, I blow your fucking brains all over the wall." I paused. "So, what'll it be?"

"Those sound like two very good choices. Give me a minute to think it over." He replied, slyly, as he began to pace around the room.

I followed him, with my gun still aimed at him.

"You have ten seconds to give me an answer, or I'll answer for you. And you don't want me to decide." I said, angrily.

A sinister smiled crept over his face. "Why don't you turn around, and ask them which one I should choose?"

I turned around to see Kerry and Levi holding Nick, his gun now in Kerry's hand.

"Choose! Now!" I yelled at Craig as I spun around back towards him.

"I think I choose the third option. You know? The one where I get away, after you watch me slice open your boyfriend?"

"Don't fucking touch him!" I screamed.

"Seems like we struck a chord, boys!" He replied, gleefully.

"Cassie, just go!" Nick yelled.

"Yeah, Cassie! Just go! We can take care of your friend on our own. It's just much more satisfying, knowing that you'll have to watch him die." Craig replied.

My blood was boiling, I was so angry my head was spinning.

All of the sudden, I heard gun shots go off and I hit the floor, along with the others in the room.

I realized that it was Nick's family that was shooting.

I heard Levi let out a loud grunt as a bullet hit him. He fell to the ground as Nick managed to get away.

He came over and laid on top of me, to protect me from the gunfire.

Kerry started shooting back at them, as Nick and I started to crawl our way towards the other side of the room.

Kerry got hit and fell swiftly to the ground, when suddenly Craig went over to him and grabbed Nick's gun that he had been holding.

"Strand! Start the boat!" I heard Travis yell out to Strand.

I saw quick glimpse of Strand running up to the captain's quarters, to get the boat moving.

Nick and I kept crawling, to make our way out through the set of doors in the kitchen.

Everyone kept shooting, trying to get Craig, as he was hiding behind the couch for safety.

Nick helped me stand up on my feet, once we reached the doors.

All of the sudden, a loud bang rang out, right next to my ears.

All I could hear was muffled screaming, as I looked back to see blood pouring out of Nick.

He had been shot.

I felt my heart drop into my stomach.

It's like everything after that was happening in slow motion.

Nick fell to the ground. And I saw Craig standing behind him, gun aimed at where Nick had once been standing.

"NICK!" I screamed, as I saw Madison running into the room.

She ran to Nick's side, sobbing as Travis ran in behind her gabbing his jacket and pressing it to Nick's side.

I felt as though I was watching it all happen, outside of my body.

I sprang up as I saw Craig starting to run off in the opposite direction.

I grabbed a knife, lying on the floor and charged at him.

I lunged up and launched myself onto him, hanging onto his back, hitting him as hard as I could, as I tried to stab him.

He grabbed me and flung me over to the side, where we both fell to the ground.

I started kicking, and the gun he had in his hands went flying across the room.

He immediately started trying to claw his way to the gun.

I gripped my knife as tightly as I could, and threw my whole body on top of him, straddling his back.

I dug my fingers into his forehead and lifted it back towards me, as hard as I could.

Now was my chance.

I took my knife and brought it down in one quick motion, slicing his throat open.

Blood poured out of him, and flowed over the wooden floors beneath us, as I heard him sputtering, realizing what I had done.

I sat up, gave a loud grunt as I used all my force, and jammed my knife straight into his skull, feeling him go limp beneath me.

I dropped the knife.

A feeling of freedom washed over me, as tears started streaming down my face.

I got off of Craig's back and ran over to where Nick was.

I felt the boat starting to move, as I saw everyone else rush into the room and surround Nick.

I sat down next to Nick, his eyes barely open.

"Nick, Nick!" I sobbed. "I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry! You hold on! You fucking hear me?! Don't you dare leave us! You have to stay with me! I need you!"

I was unable to continue talking, as my crying took over my whole body.

"Everybody move back!" Ofelia yelled as she kneeled down next to Nick.

I looked up and saw Alicia's arms wrap around me and hold me, dragging me back from Nick's body slightly.

Ofelia started yelling out to everyone what she needed, so that she could try and save Nick.

It was all a blur.

Never had I felt such relief and such regret at the same time, in my whole life.

I sat, frozen, as I stared off into space, while Nick was being put back together, in front of my eyes.

I felt numb.

I felt nothing.

I was empty.


	10. Chapter 10

Several intense and agonizing days later, I sat on the chair positioned next to the bed Nick laid on. I basically hadn't left his side for the past three days, after he was shot.

I knew he'd be okay, thanks to Ofelia, but I was so worried and shook up, that I couldn't leave him alone for longer than ten minutes.

I stared down at his handsome face. He looked so peaceful, sleeping.

I reached up and stroked a stray piece of his wavy hair out of his face, and placed it back with the rest of his hair.

I rubbed his forehead gently with my thumb as I continued to watch him, staring at every tiny speck on his face, every pore, every freckle, taking everything in more closely than I ever had before.

I felt a presence entering his room.

I looked back to see his younger sister Alicia standing at the foot of the bed.

She smiled down at me.

"Hey." She said.

"Hey." I breathed as I removed my hand resting still on Nick's head.

"How's he doing?" She asked.

I nodded. "Okay, I think. Given the circumstances…"

We were silent for several moments.

"How are you doing?" She asked.

"Me? Oh, well I'm- I'm fine. I'm good." I lied slightly.

"You sure?"

I shook my head, hesitantly. "No."

She looked at me as her eyes were filled with a sadness, filled with compassion.

She grabbed a chair, placed under the desk in the corner of the room, and pulled it to the end of the bed, facing me.

She sat down and stared at me.

"Hey, everything's fine. Nick's going to be okay." Alicia said gently.

I looked over at him. "We shouldn't even have to be having this conversation."

"Yeah, well here we are, having it." She replied. "And that's alright. Nick's doing fine. You said so yourself."

"This is all my fault. If I had never showed up in the first place, you people wouldn't have to be worrying about whether Nick's going to be alright or not."

Alicia laughed. "Actually, we're pretty used to worrying about Nick. It's weird _not_ worrying about him."

She paused. "Do you know, about Nick's…past?"

I nodded. "Yeah. We talked about it."

"Then you know that Nick being shot, isn't the scariest thing that's ever happened to us. Please, don't worry yourself sick over this. He's going to be fine."

"But what about the rest of you?" I asked.

"We're fine, Cassie. I promise you, no one blames you for what happened. We've come across our fair share of assholes. We know how the world works now." Alicia replied.

"Yeah, but. Everyone _should_ be blaming me. I put you all in danger. I should have never did what I did. It was selfish. _I_ was selfish."

"You weren't selfish. You were trying to protect yourself. We all understand why you did all of that. We now see how terrible your group was. We're glad we could be the ones who helped you get away."

We were silent as I processed everything.

Nick moved slightly, letting out a little snore. I looked over at him as a small smile formed in the corners of his mouth.

"I care about Nick." I said, breaking the silence.

"I know you do." Alicia replied.

I looked back over at her and saw a gentle smile on her face.

"He cares about you too." She said. "A lot."

"I just want you to know that my feelings for him are real, despite how crazy it may seem."

"Have you told him that?"

"No." I shook my head. "No I haven't. I actually did the complete opposite."

"You tried to push him away. You wanted to keep things casual in case- well in case something like _this_ happened."

"How do you-"

"Nick told me." Alicia smiled slightly.

"Of course he did." I replied as I smiled.

"If you could tell him how you feel, right now, what would you say?"

I sighed greatly. "Oh shit. I don't know. I guess that I- that I was stupid for thinking that staying away from him was the smart thing to do. That he was right about now being the worst time to change who I am, that we need to stay true to ourselves to survive." I paused. "That we need love to survive. And that I need to just let go of what happened to me in the past, and move on. That being together does make us stronger."

I took a deep breath in and continued. "That he drives me crazy, and sometimes I just want to slap his stupid, perfect face, but I honestly love being around him. He brings out this…this _feeling_ in me, that I haven't allowed myself to feel for a while. And deep down, I know I can't stay away from him, no matter how hard I tried. And I don't want to try to stay away."

I paused again and looked over at Nick, peacefulness still plastered on his face. "And that I need to stop _just_ being alive, and start living again."

"Do you love him?" Alicia asked.

I continued to stare at Nick. I nodded. "Yeah…yeah. I think I do."

"Then tell him."

I looked back at her. She gave me a sincere smile as she stood up. She made her way to the door, but stopped, standing in the doorway.

"Thank you, for helping us. _All_ of us."

I gave a smile back to her as I nodded my head.

"And _don't_ chicken out. Just tell him."

With that, she turned and left the room.

I looked back at Nick, who was still sleeping.

Should I wake him?

Could I just tell him how I felt while he was asleep and he'd hear it subconsciously?

I stood up and started to walk towards the door when I heard a faint grunt coming from behind me.

"H-hey." Nick managed to croak out, half asleep.

I turned around and saw Nick rubbing his eyes sleepily as he struggled to sit up on his elbows.

"Hi."

I walked over to him and began helping him sit up, placing several pillows under his back.

"Were you coming or going?" Nick asked.

"Uhm, going. But I can stay if you want." I replied. "Do you need anything?"

Nick shook his head. "Nah. I'm okay. I'm just…glad you're here."

I smiled at him. "It's the least I can do."

"You still blaming yourself for this?"

"If you can come up with someone else, whose fault it could be, I'm all ears." I replied.

"Cassie, come on. This isn't your fault."

"Yeah well, maybe I'm not the one who directly pulled the trigger, but I technically shot you by association."

"I mean _none_ of this is your fault. It's not like you knew that these people would turn out to be complete psychos." Nick replied, his voice slightly hoarse.

"It's _all_ my fault. Plain and simple." I replied.

"You need to eat. I'll get you some food." I added as I turned and began to exit the room.

"I know you don't see it, but you did save us."

I stopped walking and turned around to face him.

"Your group, they were watching us. You told us that, remember? You told us that you all had been spying on us, planning your attack." Nick started. "Whether you had been with them or not, they were planning on attacking us. If you hadn't been there, if you hadn't been making your own plan to save yourself from them, then they would have come on this ship, killed all of us, and taken everything we had."

Nick paused.

"But that didn't happen. Because _you_ didn't let that happen."

"I was only protecting myself. That's not anything to be proud of." I protested.

"You saved us." Nick took a brief pause as he started hard into my eyes. "You stood up for your own safety, and in the process you stood up for ours. No matter what you say, or think, we all know that we're alive because of you."

I sighed and hung my head in defeat. I didn't have anything to say in protest.

"You saved our lives. You need to understand that. And I'm going to keep saying it, until you get it." Nick said.

"You're impossible." I sighed.

"I know." Nick started. "I'm also right." A sly grin spread across his face.

"You're also pressing your luck." I smiled back.

"Tell that to the hole in my side." He joked.

I shook my head, fighting back a smart ass remark. "Do you want food or not?"

"Depends."

"On what?" I asked.

"If you'll stay and eat with me." He smiled.

"Fine." I replied. "Any other requests? Want a lobster dinner too?"

"I'll settle for steak." Nick shrugged.

"I'll see what I can do." I winked.

I turned around and made my way up the stairs and into the kitchen.

I started to gather the things up to make two peanut butter sandwiches.

I was about halfway done, when I noticed Madison making her way into the kitchen.

"Making lunch?" She asked.

"Yeah, Nick's up." I replied.

"Great. How is he?"

"He's…Nick." I joked.

Madison smiled. "Looks like he'll be just fine."

I nodded. "Yeah. I think so."

We were silent for several moments, as Madison made some instant coffee and I finished the sandwiches.

"Thanks for looking after him." Madison said, breaking the silence.

I looked up over at her.

"It's no problem." I replied. "I feel like if anyone should do it, it should be me."

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"I'm sorry, for everything that's happened since I showed up. I didn't really get a chance to apologize to you when Nick was shot. But I…I feel _horrible_ for bringing you all into my mess." I replied.

"Oh, no. Cassie, none of us are angry with you. I'm sorry if you've gotten that impression from any of us."

"Nick and Alicia have both said pretty much that same sentence to me, but I still feel responsible."

I paused, trying to find my words. "I just want to thank you. For everything you've done _for me_. For showing me that not all people left, are terrible. That there's still hope for humanity. Or what's left of it."

Madison gave me a small smile. "We're happy to have you. You are part of our group now."

"I appreciate it." I smiled back.

"You like Nick, don't you?" Madison asked, as she stared at me with the same piercing look as Nick.

"Like him? As in-"

"The two of you have a bond." Madison stated.

"What gave it away?" I asked.

"The fact that I have eyes and can see." Madison joked.

"Your son, he's a remarkable person." I replied.

"Are we talking about the same Nick?" She joked.

I laughed lightly. "Yeah. We are."

"What made you come to that conclusion?" She asked.

"He just- he's not who I originally thought he was. I made a snap judgement about him, and when we went out alone, he proved me wrong. He has this way, of looking at the world, as if it's never changed. Almost as if it's gotten better."

I paused. "He really made me see everything in a new light. He pulled me out of a dark place, that I couldn't even admit I was in. He really is a truly amazing person."

"He is. Who knew this craziness, would bring out the worst in most people, and would bring out the best in him?"

"I suppose all those years he spent lost in his addiction, really prepared him to not be fazed by all of this." I replied.

"You know about his addiction?"

I nodded. "Yes. He was very open and honest with me about it."

"I'm glad to hear the two of you have formed something." She smiled again.

"So am I."

"I'll let you take him his lunch."

I nodded.

Madison and I exchanged smiles as she walked out of the kitchen.

I grabbed the plate with the sandwiches, and made my way back down to Nick's room.

I walked in to see him reading my Great Gatsby book again.

"Still like it?" I asked.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah. It's really good. I'm almost finished, actually."

"Well, no steak. So I made the next best thing- peanut butter sandwiches." I said as I sat down in my chair next to the bed.

"Steak was a code word for PB and J. How did you know?" He joked, as he sat up straighter.

"Because I know everything." I replied as I took a bite of my sandwich.

"Oh really?" Nick asked as he took a big bite. "Then what am I thinking right now?"

I paused. "That you probably shouldn't be talking with your mouth full."

He swallowed his bite and smiled at me. "Damn, you're good."

"Told you." I smiled.

We smiled at one another and enjoyed the company as we ate our lunch.


	11. Chapter 11

I sat on the boat's back deck in the early morning, staring out into the water.

The sun was sleepily peeking through the grey clouds above, casting a dreamy glow over everything.

I took a deep breath in of the salty air, as the wind blew gently as the boat moved along.

Suddenly I felt a presence approaching me.

I turned around to see Nick standing in front of me.

His wavy brown hair stuck out around his handsome face.

His white tee shirt hung over his body and hit his hips, where his dark blue plaid pajama pants started.

He rubbed his eyes as he stared down at me.

A smile crept over his face.

"Hey, you're up early." I smiled up at him.

"I woke up and noticed you weren't there. Figured I'd find you here." He replied.

I nodded in return. "Wanted to get some fresh air."

"So, how do I look?" Nick joked as he spun around for me to see him.

"Pretty good, for someone who recently had a bullet go through him." I smiled.

Nick laughed. "Mind if I sit?"

"Of course not." I replied.

He took a seat beside me.

We stared at each other for a few moments.

"How do you feel?" I asked as I looked him up and down briefly.

"I feel great actually." Nick said. "Pain's not too bad today."

"Well I'd say so. You made it all the way out here without any help."

"I had some motivation." Nick smiled as he winked playfully.

I rolled my eyes jokingly and laughed. "Glad I could help."

We fell into silence as we both looked out over the water.

"Hey, can I tell you something?"

I turned back around to look at him.

"Sure. What's up?" I replied.

He took in a deep breath as he stared at me.

"Yesterday, when you and Alicia were talking, you thought I was asleep but…but I was actually awake. I heard what you told her. About us."

I chuckled lightly. "Oh I know you were awake."

"Wait. You do?" Nick asked shocked. "How did you know?"

"I've seen you sleeping enough times to know when you're _really_ asleep."

"Oh. Well, uhm-"

"Nick, I knew you were awake. And I knew you were listening. That's why I told your sister the truth. I _wanted_ you to hear it." I replied.

"So, all that stuff you said, about me being right and you being in love with me, that was the truth?" Nick asked.

I nodded. "I meant every word."

A wide smile spread across his face.

"Staying away from you to keep you safe, is the dumbest thing I could have ever came up with. Obviously because it didn't work. I'm done fighting what I'm feeling. I'm ready to do this, if you are."

Nick beamed at me.

He put his hands on the back of my neck and pulled me in to him.

I felt his soft lips touch mine as we started to kiss.

We both took in every bit of this perfect moment.

Moments like these were few and far between in a world like this.

We broke away from our intense kiss.

I smiled at Nick, taking in his sickeningly perfect face.

"So, is that a yes?" I asked playfully.

Nick smiled at me again and pulled me into another kiss.

I brought my hands up and played with his hair.

I felt his tongue slip gently into my mouth as we deepened our kiss.

We continued to kiss, letting all of our pent up emotions out.

It was getting slightly heated, when I heard someone clear their throat close to us.

We broke apart from each other and saw Alicia standing in the doorway that led back inside.

She waved at us awkwardly and gave us a smile.

"H-hey, Alicia." Nick said to her, trying to act casual, disappointment slightly in his voice.

"I saw what you were doing, you don't have to act all weird." Alicia replied as she made her way over to us.

We all stared at one another in silence for several moments.

"Hey, your brother made it out here by himself. He's definitely healing fast." I said, trying to take the focus off Nick and I getting caught mid-make out.

"Yeah. I feel great!" Nick smiled to Alicia.

"Yeah, I can see why." Alicia replied slyly as she grinned.

Nick and I looked over at each other briefly and started laughing lightly.

"Sorry, I interrupted." Alicia started. "But Nick, mom wants to talk to you."

"Yeah? About what?" Nick asked.

"I don't know. She was just looking for you and asked me to find you." Alicia replied. "She probably just wants to make sure your spleen hasn't fallen out yet."

"Nope. Still there." Nick grinned as he gave his bullet wound a light pat. "Where is she?"

"Down in your room."

Nick nodded.

"Hey, I'll be back later." He said to me.

"Okay." I replied.

"We'll pick up where we left off." Nick smiled as he made his way towards the door that led inside.

Alicia scrunched up her face as I rolled my eyes and smiled.

"Maybe somewhere with more privacy!" I called after him.

Nick gave a playful smile before disappearing back inside the boat.

"Sorry, about that." I apologized to Alicia.

"It's fine, really." Alicia replied. "I'm glad this is happening for you guys."

"Really? You don't think it'll make anything weird?"

"With everyone else? Nah. I mean finding love, especially now, is a tad…bizarre or unlikely, I guess. But no one's going to be mad."

"You think so?" I asked.

"Yeah. You're pretty normal, by the new world standards. And Nick hasn't had normalcy in his life for, like, a _long_ time. You're good for him. I can tell."

I smiled lightly and nodded. "Yeah. I suppose you're right. Thanks, Alicia."

She smiled. "No problem."

Nick made his way down to his room and found him mom standing and staring out one of the windows.

"Alicia said you wanted to talk to me?" Nick asked.

Madison turned around and stared at him.

"How are you feeling?" She asked.

"You had me come back down here, just to ask me that?" Nick asked.

Madison gave him a stern look.

"I'm fine, mom. I feel good." Nick added.

"Did you make it back down stairs by yourself?" Madison asked.

"Yeah I did. I think it's safe for me to finally leave this room. Which is why I wasn't in it."

"We should still have Ofelia check you out, before you start going back to normal."

Nick nodded. "Sure."

They were silent as Madison moved closer to Nick.

She looked up at him. "I spoke with Cassie yesterday."

"You did?" Nick asked. "Hope you told her to stop blaming herself for this."

"I did. She feels pretty guilty. But she'll come around." Madison replied.

"Hope so."

"So, you told her about your addiction?"

Nick looked a little shocked. "Yeah…how- how did you know that?"

"She told me." Madison replied. "She also told me that she thinks you're a remarkable person."

Nick smiled. "Really?"

"You two really have something, don't you?"

"Yeah. I think so."

"You've been really honest with her. I'm surprised." Madison said.

"Well, I don't see why I shouldn't be. The world definitely doesn't need any dishonesty, now."

"But it needed it before?" Madison asked.

"Yeah." Nick began. "Things were too normal. We had to keep them that way. Any time things were going bad, we turned to lying so they didn't seem so terrible, so we could protect ourselves. But now…now we don't have to do that. We need the truth, to keep us safe."

"I suppose you're right." Madison said. "Cassie said that you see the world as a better place now. And that you helped her see it that way too. And that you pulled her out of a dark place."

"Yeah. I mean I guess I do think the world is better off now." Nick replied.

"You're _really_ okay with what's happening out there?" Madison asked.

"I'm not afraid of it. The world has always looked like that to me. I like to think that I've always seen it the way that it really was. Now everyone else is seeing it that way too."

"I see."

"Mom, did you need to ask me anything? Or was this what you wanted to talk about?"

Madison sighed. "When Cassie told me how you helped her cope with all of this, I honestly thought she was joking. I thought to myself, the Nick I've known for the past several years, has never been around to help us through our issues. The Nick I knew, ran from us when everything went down with his father. And he never stopped running."

Nick just stared down at his mother, seeing the pain in her eyes.

"Until now." Madison finished. "Why is that? Why did you stop running now?"

"It's not that I stopped running." Nick started. "It's that everyone has finally caught up with me."

"We're scared, Nick."

Nick put his arms on his mom's shoulders. "It's okay to be scared, mom."

He pulled his mom into his chest and held her.

"You'll get used to it. And when you do, you'll be able to feel normal again."

Madison looked up at Nick, as he smiled gently down at her.

She reached up and placed her hands on his cheeks.

"I hope you're right." She whispered.

She gently kissed his left cheek and exited the room.

Later that evening, after eating dinner with everyone, I was up on the deck balcony, the sun disappearing quickly on the water's horizon.

Nick was playing a card game with Alicia and Travis' son Chris, down in his sister's room, celebrating the fact that he could move around on his own, but not celebrating too much, seeing as he was still healing.

I stayed and watched Nick beat both his sister and Chris' butts at the game for about an hour, before I excused myself to use the restroom and snuck up to the deck afterwards.

It was quiet and I needed some fresh air.

As welcomed as I felt, especially after a dinner where everyone toasted to the fact that Nick was healing and that I had successfully helped everyone leave to safety, I still felt the need to count my blessings, and be truly thankful that I was with these people now, that they forgave me and understood my situation.

They were my new family, in a sense.

And it was starting to finally feel like my home.

"That was an awfully long bathroom trip."

I heard a voice come from behind me.

I turned around to see Nick standing and smiling at me.

"I needed some fresh air, and you were having so much fun, I didn't want to interrupt."

"Fair enough." Nick replied as he walked over towards me.

"Did Alicia finally beat you?" I asked.

"Hell no." Nick laughed. "Ofelia showed up to check my wound. She got suckered into the game, pretty much took my place."

"How is it?" I asked.

"The brutal ass kicking that was happening downstairs?"

I laughed. "No, I meant how's your wound."

"Oh. Well, why don't you check it out for yourself?" Nick smirked as he lifted up his t-shirt.

He grabbed my hand gently and placed it on the bandage that covered his injury.

I rubbed my thumb gently on his skin, looking up at him.

He bit his lip playfully and leaned down, kissing me tenderly.

He reached up and put his hands on the back of my head, deepening our kiss.

I pulled away from him, smiling. "It looks like it could use some more healing before you engage in any…vigorous activities."

"That's a good point. But what about turning those vigorous activities more gentle, for the time being?" Nick purred, leaning in and kissing me again.

"Gentle's good. If gentle activities are another word for cuddling."

Nick groaned. " _Come on_."

I took my hand off of his wound and pulled his shirt back down.

I reached up and tucked his hair behind his ear.

"You're still healing. You don't want to ruin your stitches. You know, those _things_ that are pretty much holding you together?"

"I promise I'll take it easy." Nick pleaded.

"Now, what's the fun in taking it easy?" I teased as I smiled seductively up at him.

A wide grin spread across his handsome face.

"There will be plenty of time for us to do everything we want, but right now the only thing we _can_ do, is make sure you heal properly." I said.

"I know, I know."

"Plus, I need you to get your full strength back." I winked.

Nick laughed. "Oh I will. And then some."

"Can't wait." I wrapped my arms around his neck and stood up on my tip toes, planting a gentle kiss on his lips.

I pulled away from him and grabbed his hand.

"Come on. Let's go kick all their asses at that game."

"Yes ma'am." Nick smiled.


	12. Chapter 12

The sun peeked through the window of Nick's bedroom.

I had fallen asleep in the bed with him last night, for the first time since we had been back on the boat.

We spent the night cuddling in the full sized bed, after we snuck away early from the heated card game going on down the hall.

We fell asleep snuggled up to one another.

It was the first time I felt like I had gotten real sleep, since the world changed.

I opened my eyes fully to find only myself in the bed.

Nick wasn't next to me.

I rubbed my eyes and wondered where he had gone.

I thought about getting up, but chose to wrap myself tighter in the blanket.

It smelled of Nick.

I heard the sound of someone turning the doorknob.

The door opened and gave way to Nick, holding a tray with what appeared to be breakfast.

Travis stood behind him, his hand pushing the bedroom door open for Nick.

"You're up." Nick smiled.

"H-hey." I replied sheepishly, feeling awkward that Travis was staring in at me lying in Nick's bed.

"Sorry, sorry. I'm not here. Just helping Nick with the door." Travis apologized, noticing how embarrassed I was.

"Thanks." Nick said to Travis.

"Enjoy." Travis said as he closed the door behind him.

"Hope you're hungry." Nick said as he walked over to the bed.

"You did all this for me?" I asked sweetly as I sat upright in the bed, crossing my legs to make room for the tray.

"Well, the last time I tried to surprise you with breakfast, it didn't go so well. Thought I needed a do over." Nick replied as he placed the tray in front of me.

He sat down in the bed next to me.

"You most certainly deserved a do over. And you succeeded."

"I _sort of_ succeeded. They're frozen waffles. But I did manage to find Strand's secret stash of real maple syrup."

"Well done, Clark." I smiled as I grabbed the bottle and poured some over my waffles.

I handed him the syrup as I cut into my stack of waffles and started eating.

"You know, I actually prefer frozen waffles to fresh made ones." I said.

"You're kidding, right?" Nick asked.

"No. Unfortunately I'm not." I started. "I grew up eating the frozen ones. My brother got me ready for school most mornings, and the frozen ones were all he knew how to make."

"Your parents didn't get you up for school?"

I shook my head as I continued to eat. "They worked crazy hours. Once my brother was old enough to work a toaster, Eggo Waffles were all we practically ate for breakfast."

"What, uhm…what did your parents do for a living?" Nick asked.

"They were both doctors." I replied.

"Doctors? Wow. That must have been pretty cool."

" _Cool_?" I laughed. "Didn't you just hear my frozen waffle, every day for breakfast story?"

Nick laughed. "Yeah, okay so it doesn't sound like the greatest. But, hey if they were both doctors, you must have been like pretty rich."

"Yeah, we were pretty well off." I said. "But money isn't the coolest thing to a seven-year-old. Having your parents cook you breakfast, or having them show up to one of your soccer games, is way cooler than having lots of money."

"Whoa, Cassie. I'm-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring anything up that might upset you."

"Hey. No, no. It's fine. I'm fine, Nick." I replied as I looked over at him.

He stared back at me, looking concerned.

" _Really_. It's okay. I can talk about it without getting upset." I added.

"Did they really never show up to any of your games?"

I sighed. "My dad did. Once. He was there for about ten minutes before something more important came up."

"That must have been awful. I'm really sorry."

"Again, it's fine." I said. "I mean of course I was hurt, at the time. I was _so_ mad at them, I didn't even want to go home. I stayed at my grandma's for two weeks after that. But then, over time, I got used to it. And before I knew it, I wasn't upset by it anymore."

"They made a huge mistake, missing out on spending time with you." Nick said. "If I were them, I'd never forgive myself for that."

I gave Nick a small smile and leaned in and kissed him.

"Thanks for the breakfast." I said.

"Thanks for the company." Nick replied.

We finished up our breakfast and sat on his bed, giggling and playing around.

We heard a knock on the door.

I quickly pulled the covers back over me, since I was only wearing one of Nick's t-shirts.

"Yeah. Come in." Nick called out.

The door opened to Travis standing in the doorway.

"Sorry to interrupt, but I figured it would be slightly less awkward if I was the one to do the interrupting, rather than your mother." Travis said.

"Thanks for that." Nick said. "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, yeah. Everything's fine." Travis said. "Strand just wants to have a meeting today, with everyone."

"Do you know what it's about?" Nick asked.

"It's about where were going to go next. We need to figure out our route and get on it." Travis replied.

"Oh, okay."

"Also, we're stopping the boat and anchoring, to save gas until we figure out the plan."

Nick and I both nodded.

"Okay? So just be brainstorming about some places nearby that you may want to go. We're up for suggestions."

"Gotcha." Nick replied.

"Meeting's in two hours." Travis said.

Nick gave a simple thumbs up.

"We'll be there." I said.

"Okay. See you in two hours. I promise I won't drop in again. I'll get out of your hair."

"It's okay." Nick laughed.

Travis gave a wave and exited the room, shutting the door behind him.

"So, where do you wanna go?" Nick asked as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Nowhere, at the moment." I smiled.

"Nowhere sounds perfect." Nick smiled back.

Nick and I spent the next several hours joking around and talking.

He also taught me the card game him and the others were playing last night, so we could get another game going, and I could help crush them.

We realized that it was time for the meeting, truthfully we were several minutes late to the meeting.

We grabbed hands and made our way upstairs, Nick tickling me as we did so.

"Nick, cut it out." I laughed as we walked into the giant living room, where the big dining table was.

Nick jammed his fingers into my side. "Does this tickle?"

"Yes!" I giggled. "I said cut it out!"

"What about this?"

I let out a loud laugh. "Yes! Okay? Yes!"

Everyone looked over at us as we made our way fully into the room, their faces serious.

Nick and I both stopped what we were doing, feeling a tad awkward, feeling like two school kids, who just got caught by a room full of teachers.

"Uhm, here let me get the chair for you." I said to Nick as I pulled out an empty chair at the table, everyone's eyes still on us.

He took a seat as I stood behind him and glanced over at Alicia, who was smirking and trying to hold back laughter.

"Thank you for finally gracing us with your presence." Strand said, slightly annoyed.

"Sorry. We lost track of time." Nick apologized.

"Well, let's try and not waste any more time, shall we?" Strand replied.

"Got it, boss." Nick said, giving Strand a smile, although Strand didn't return one.

"So, we need a new place to go." Strand began. "Anyone got any suggestions?"

Everyone was quiet for several moments, not wanting to be the first to speak up.

"I've got one." Alicia said, to everyone's surprise.

"Really?" Madison asked.

Alicia nodded. "Yeah. I've been giving it some thought since we left."

Madison looked over at Strand, giving him a 'give her a chance' look.

"Alright. Let's hear it." Strand said.

"I know we're pretty far north, but I was thinking that…we should maybe try and go back…home."

"Home?" Madison asked. "As in L.A?"

"Yeah. I'm talking about L.A."

Strand let out a loud laugh, causing me to jump slightly.

"That's the funniest thing I've heard in a while." Strand said. "You can't be serious."

"I'm completely serious." Alicia replied, standing her ground.

"Alicia, that's insane." Nick chimed in.

"No. No it isn't." Alicia began as she stood up. "L.A. is _our home_. It's where we grew up! We can't just leave it forever!"

"Alicia, honey. We can't go back there. That isn't our home anymore." Madison said, trying to let her down easy.

"Yes it is! It will always be our home!" Alicia shouted. "Mom, how can you say that?"

"Because, sweetie. I'm being realistic here."

"Los Angeles is gone." Strand said. "We saw it burn to the ground. The only thing left there, are the ashes from what was _once_ your home."

"And how do you know that?! How do you know there's nothing left?!" Alicia yelled. "It's the place we all know best! We can't just _never_ go back!"

"It's gone." Strand said simply. "Next suggestion."

"Alicia." Madison started as Alicia's face filled with sadness and anger.

"Alicia!" Madison yelled after her, as she ran out of the room in a fury. "Dammit, Strand."

"I'll go." Chris said, as he stood up to go after Alicia. "It's not like my idea would be chosen anyways."

Chris gave Strand a mean glare as he exited the room, to go comfort Alicia.

"Now we can have a _real_ discussion." Strand said.

"Hey, don't give them the chance to speak up, and then get pissed at them, for doing so." Madison said, angrily.

"Tell them not to give me stupid answers."

"Hey!" Travis interrupted.

"Stop! Seriously, everyone just knock it off." Nick said as he raised his voice. "Arguing isn't going to solve anything."

The older adults in the room were quiet, although I could see they were angry by the looks on their faces.

"We have a suggestion." Nick added.

"We?" Strand asked.

"Yes. Cassie and me." Nick replied. " _We_."

"What is it, Nick?" Madison asked.

Nick looked back and up at me. He gave me a reassuring nod.

I cleared my throat. "San Diego."

"San Diego?" Strand asked. "That's almost as bad as suggesting L.A!"

"Hey, man." Nick said. "Hear her out."

"My family has a house on an island off the coast of there. It's on a lot of land and it's right on the water. And I have the keys to it."

"And this place is safe, you think?" Madison asked.

I nodded. "Yeah. Well, I mean I don't know for sure, but-"

"You don't know for _sure_. Of course you don't know for sure. How could you?" Strand interrupted me.

"Hey!" I yelled. "You _asked_ us for suggestions! If you knew you were just going to shut them all down, then you should have just saved us the time, and told us where we were going! It _is_ your boat, after all. You didn't have to set this up, to make us feel like we actually have a say in any of this, if we really don't."

Everyone froze as I yelled at Strand.

"Just tell us where the hell we're going, so we can get on with our lives." I added.

Strand stared at me, his dark brown eyes piercing into mine, like he was waiting for me to crack.

"You know your way around this island?" He finally asked me.

"My family has had this vacation house since I was six years old. What do you think?" I replied, annoyed.

He was silent again as he paced back and forth in front of the table.

"Strand!" Nick yelled slightly. "Are we going there or not?"

Strand let out a giant sigh. "We pick up anchor in the morning. You can come up then and give me the coordinates."

Nick looked back at me and smiled. I smiled weakly back at him, feeling shocked that I actually stood up for myself, for my idea, against Strand.

"Nice talk." Strand added as he walked up the stairs that led to the captain's quarters.

Nick stood up and wrapped me in his arms.

"See? I told you your idea was great." He said as he kissed the top of my head.

"Yeah. I'm not so sure." I replied.

Nick let me out of his embrace and I walked towards the stairs, making my way back to Nick's bedroom.

He followed behind me, walking slowly.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He asked as he made it to the room.

I stared out the window, looking out over the vast ocean.

"I shouldn't have even opened my mouth." I breathed, my back still towards him.

"What are you talking about? You have a really good plan for us."

I shook my head. "I'm already on thin ice. I know what Strand thinks of me."

"Cassie, come on. That's not true. No one's mad at you." Nick replied.

"He's not mad at me." I said as I turned around to face Nick. "He resents me."

"No, no. That's just- that's just how Strand _is_. You'll get used to it."

"He's not a big fan of me. I can just _feel_ it. Maybe you don't see it, because he _actually_ likes you." I replied.

"Strand is a complicated person. He's glad you're here. He's thankful that you helped protect him and his boat, he just may not show it in the most…obvious way."

"I guess." I whispered.

Nick walked closer to me and grabbed my hand. "I can talk to him, if you want me to."

"No, that's alright. I think it's best to just stay out of his way."

"Once we get to your parents' house, he'll come around. He'll see how great it is." Nick smiled.

"I mean, I get why he's so leery about where we go. He wants security and nowhere is a guarantee of that anymore. But, we have to take chances in order to find safety. Some work out and some don't." I said.

"Trust me, if he didn't really want any of our opinions, he wouldn't have wasted time having a meeting with us. He would have just picked where we were going, and told us when we got there."

"This is why we work." I smiled up at Nick. "You know what to say, to make everything seem not so terrible."

"We also work because we get to do this…" Nick smirked as he leaned in began kissing me.

I broke away from him after several moments of kissing and giggled.

"Slow down there, lover boy." I joked. "We went over this yesterday."

"I was _only_ kissing you. And kissing falls under the gentle activities category."

"Yes, but kissing can lead to _other_ activities, that you aren't well enough to participate in yet."

"Hey now. I take offense to that." Nick smiled. "I can control my urges."

"Can you now? And when do you plan on actually trying to show me those self-control skills of yours?"

"I said I _can_ control them, not that I _am_ controlling them."

I laughed as I put my hand on his chest, stopping him from leaning in for a kiss.

"I think I hear a cold shower calling your name." I joked.

"Or maybe that's you, calling my name." Nick said as his signature sly smiled spread across his face.

I rolled my eyes as I laughed. "You just earned yourself some isolation time, Mister."

"Are you ordering me to stay in my room?"

"Yep." I replied. "And I want the next two chapters of that book read by the time I get back."

"You sound like a naughty boarding school teacher." Nick smiled. "I'm into it."

"Do your homework, Mr. Clark." I winked.

"Yes, ma'am." Nick smiled.

I gave him a kiss on the cheek and exited the room, giving him some much needed alone time to cool off.

I was upstairs, on the boat's deck, sitting and staring out at the water.

I could faintly see San Francisco's outline.

I was glad that I was leaving, but I would definitely miss it.

I felt someone walking up behind me.

"Finished already?" I asked, assuming it was Nick.

The person cleared their throat and I instantly knew it wasn't Nick.

I turned around to see Strand standing behind me.

I just stared up at him, unsure of what to say.

"Saying goodbye to your home?" Strand asked as he looked in the direction I had been looking.

"I'm not going to suggest we go back, don't worry." I replied, slightly bitterly.

He let out a brief chuckle. "Good girl."

We were silent as he continued to stare out over the water with me.

"You know, we could have technically stayed." Strand said, ending the silence.

I shook my head. "It's time to let S.F. go."

"Too many difficult memories?"

"Good. Bad. A mixture of both. I can't hold on to any of them anymore." I replied. "All good things, must come to an end."

"Enlightened way of looking at it."

"Honest way of looking at it." I said.

We fell into several more moments of silence. I expected Strand to leave, but he stayed put, staring at the faint outlines of the buildings we were leaving behind.

"Coronado." Strand finally said.

"What?" I asked.

"Coronado." Strand repeated. "That's where your house is, isn't it?"

He looked over at me.

"Yes." I replied, simply.

"It's quite beautiful there."

"Yeah. It is." I paused. "You've been there before?"

He nodded. "Oh yes. Lived there for a while."

"You don't say?" I replied.

"Small world, isn't it?"

"I suppose it may feel that way now." I said.

More silence engulfed us.

"Grey." Strand said.

I looked back over him as he stared down at me.

"Cassie Grey."

I looked shocked as I was taken aback. "How-how do you know my name?"

"The Greys." He said. "I knew your parents."

I shook my head as I stood up. "No, no. That's not possible."

"Oh it is." He laughed. "A…close friend of mine, had a house there, for many years."

I was silent, wanting him to hurry up and finish talking.

"He was neighbors with a family. Two doctors. One was a surgeon, the other one was a neonatal surgeon. Charlie and Selena Grey."

He paused. "Those are your parents, correct?"

"Y-yes, but-"

"They had two children, a young girl named Cassidy and a slightly older boy named Jacob." He said. "Cassie and Jake."

"Thomas. Your close friend's name is Thomas." I said in shock. "Thomas Abigail."

I looked around at the boat, my eyes landing on the boat's name.

"This is his boat, isn't it?" I asked, still in disbelief.

Strand nodded. "Indeed it is."

"So that makes you…" I started. "Victor. Your first name is Victor."

"Bingo." He smiled slightly.

"Did you know…who I was? Have you known this whole time?" I asked.

"Yes. I recognized you the second you came on this boat."

"You look just like your mother." He added.

"Why- why didn't you tell anyone?" I asked.

"It's not my place to tell."

"But, when I came on the boat, and everyone thought I was some horrible person, you _knew_ who I was. You knew my parents. And you didn't think it was a good time to tell them?"

"I knew you when you were younger. And I only knew you briefly. Time has passed, and you have grown up. And the world has changed greatly. I wasn't sure what kind of person you grew up to be."

I was silent, not knowing what to say.

"Well, why haven't you told them now?" I finally asked.

"Because, it's not anything of importance. You've proved yourself to these people on your own. You don't need my help to redeem your name."

"I guess." I replied.

"I liked you. You were a feisty kid." Strand said. "Although I never got the impression that you liked me, very much."

"You weren't very nice." I replied. "You weren't like Thomas."

Strand laughed. "No, I'm not. Thomas was definitely the nicer one. He loved kids. Always wanted a few."

"Plus, I'm sure it didn't help that when we met, I was a moody teenager. I didn't really like anyone." I replied.

"I figured as much."

We were silent for a few moments.

"Did you speak to him, when everything happened?" I asked.

Strand sighed greatly. "I went and saw him."

"Where was he?"

"Mexico."

"You went all the way to Mexico, in all of this?" I asked.

He nodded. "Yes. That was the plan. To get on the boat and go to where he was and to stay there, permanently."

"What happened? Why didn't you stay?"

"Well, I gained a whole group of people, for one." He began. "And when we finally got there, we didn't exactly get a…warm welcome."

"Did it get taken over by the infected?" I asked.

"It did."

"Thomas…didn't make it?"

Strand shook his head. "He was too damn generous. Got himself bitten trying to help people."

"I'm sorry." I said. "You loved him."

Strand smiled. "And how do you know that?"

"My parents may not have been around much, but they were always very honest with me and my brother. They told us you were a couple."

"I see." Strand replied. "I loved him, like you love Nicholas."

I smiled lightly, nodding my head. "Did you know Nick before the…apocalypse?"

"No, I didn't. I met him at the very beginning. I was planning on taking him with me, to Mexico. Then I learned that he came with a whole set of people. Hence why I have a group with me now."

"You're not much of a people person, are you?" I asked.

"I'm more of a loner man, myself." He replied.

"I'm assuming your brother didn't make it." He added.

I looked down at the ground, trying to find the words to say.

"He did. For a while." I replied.

"He was a good kid. I'm sure he put up a good fight."

I nodded in return. "Until he lost."

"He always took good care of you, didn't he? You followed him around more than his own shadow, from what Thomas would tell me."

I smiled slightly, remembering spending summers with my brother at the Coronado house.

"I'm sorry that you lost him." Strand said.

"I'm sorry you lost Thomas." I replied.

We exchanged small smiles.

"Get ready to see your old home away from home." He said as he made his way towards the door that led back inside.

"Oh and stay close to Nicholas. He's a good man. And he's quite infatuated with you." He added.

"Will do." I replied.

And with that, he exited the deck.

Later that night, after dinner and another round of card games, Nick and I sat on his bed.

He was reading more of my book, as I mindlessly shuffled the deck of cards.

"Cass?" Nick asked.

I heard him, but I was so deep in thought, that I didn't respond.

"Cassie?" Nick repeated.

I finally snapped out of my trance like state.

"Yeah?" I asked as I looked over at him.

"You've been shuffling that deck for the past thirty minutes."

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to bother you while you're reading." I replied as I stopped shuffling.

"You're not bothering me." Nick replied. "But is there something bothering you?"

"What? No. No. I'm fine."

"Are you still worried that everyone's mad at you?"

"No." I shook my head. "I know I was wrong about that."

"So then what is it?"

"What makes you think something is bothering me?" I asked.

"I can just see that you're deep in thought about something." Nick replied. "Is there anything you want to talk about?"

"Yes." I paused. "No. I mean it's late. I should probably get to bed."

I stood up and began to gather up a few of my things.

"Yeah, I've been wanting to talk to you about that."

"About sleeping?" I asked, confused.

"About our…sleeping _arrangements_."

I stopped grabbing my stuff.

"Oh." I said. "Well, I think you're okay now. Unless you're still worried. In which case, I can stay in here another night."

"Well actually, I was kinda thinking that…that uhm, you could stay in here. You know. For good."

"You mean like, every night? Like _moving in_ together?" I asked.

"Yeah, I guess you could put it that way." Nick replied.

"Wow, that's fast. I mean we haven't even updated our Facebook statuses yet." I joked.

Nick smiled and laughed. "Shit. You're right. We best get on that."

I smiled at him as I took a seat back down on the bed. "You sure you want me in here with you, twenty-four seven?"

"I'd say even longer than that, if there was more time in the day." Nick replied sweetly.

"I'd love to stay in here with you." I said. "I'll go get the rest of my things."

Nick smiled and kissed me.

"But." I began. "There's something I need to talk to you about first."

"Okay. What is it?" Nick asked.

"When I went upstairs earlier, and gave you some alone time, Strand came and talked to me." I said.

"Whoa, really?"

I nodded. "Yeah. And-"

I paused and tried to gain confidence before I spoke again.

"Strand and I…sort of…know each other."

His face looked shocked. "What? How?"

"Well, when I first saw him on the boat, I thought he looked familiar. But I thought I was just going crazy. That I was just trying to find some comfort and familiarity in the new world." I said. "But now I know for sure, that I knew him."

"Did you, like, live in L.A. before or something?" Nick asked.

I shook my head. "No. Strand told me about Mexico. That that's where you all went after L.A. was destroyed. He told me you went to his friend's house there."

"Yeah. His boyfriend's house."

"Thomas." I said.

Nick nodded. "How-"

"I knew Thomas. I know that this is his boat." I said. "He had a house next to my family's vacation house. In Coronado. I spent every summer there. Thomas watched me and my brother grow up. He was best friends with my parents."

"How long have you known Strand then?"

"Only for a few years. I met him when they must have started dating. The last summer before Thomas sold the house. I was about fourteen or fifteen. That was the only time I ever saw Strand, that's why I wasn't sure if I knew him or not."

"Wow. That's _crazy_." Nick said. "He must have remembered you once you mentioned your vacation house."

"Not quite." I said. "He recognized me the second he saw me."

"He did? Why didn't he say anything then?"

"He said it wasn't his place. That everyone needed to be able to trust me, or _not_ trust me, on their own."

"That's a good point, since they don't really trust everything that Strand says anyways." Nick replied. "But still. He could've at least told _me_."

"I'm glad he didn't."

"Why?"

"Because you got to know me and fall for me, all on your own." I replied.

"Yeah, but if I would have known about the rich parents and vacation house on an island, I would have fallen for you _much_ faster." Nick joked.

"Jackass." I smiled as I pushed his shoulder lightly.

"So, since Strand knows you, does that mean he also can tell me some of your deep, dark secrets?"

"Nope." I replied.

"Dammit." Nick smiled.


	13. Chapter 13

I awoke the next morning, lying next to Nick.

We had spent our first official night in the room we now shared.

We spent most of the morning, sleepily talking about the dreams we had last night and having a mini make-out session.

"Please, let me go brush my teeth." I said, as I broke away from Nick's lips.

"Nope." Nick replied, as he leaned in, kissing me again. "I like morning breath."

"Ew! What is wrong with you?" I laughed.

"What?" Nick smiled. "I have a thing for sleepy kissing. Morning breath and all."

"Seriously, grossest thing I've heard in a while."

"You mean sexiest thing you've heard in a while." Nick laughed, as we started kissing again.

"Come on." I started, as I sat up. "I have to get out of this bed."

"Why?" Nick whined.

"Because, I have to go give Strand the coordinates. You know? So we can stop floating in the middle of nowhere?"

"I know, I know. You're right." Nick replied. "Aren't you going to miss San Fran though? It's your home."

I sighed. "Yeah, it's been my home for a few years. I have a lot of memories attached to it. Good and bad. But I'm ready to leave, go to my other home."

"A few years?" Nick asked. "I thought you grew up here?"

I shook my head. "No. I grew up in Monterey, but I visited San Francisco a lot, before I moved here."

I got up and started to get dressed.

"Hmm." He began. "There's a lot of things we don't know about each other."

"Yeah. Remember our pact? That our past isn't important anymore?"

"Yes, but I thought that only counted for all the bad stuff that we've done. I didn't know it meant we couldn't learn _anything_ about one another." He replied.

"We can. And we will. In time."

Nick gave me a look. "I just care about you, and I want to know everything about you."

"Whoa, everything?" I laughed.

"Yes. Everything." He smiled.

"Things about who we were, before all of this, will come up. And when they do, we can talk all about them." I said as I leaned in and kissed him. "I promise."

I made my way towards the door. "Besides, I'm dying to know all about little Nick."

"Little Nick, huh?" Nick asked. "Why don't you come over and ask him yourself?"

He smiled at me slyly as he patted himself, below the belt.

I rolled my eyes. "Ha. Ha. Funny."

"Have fun with Strand." Nick said.

"Have fun with Little Nick." I replied, as I smiled at him.

And with that, I left, making my way upstairs.

I walked into the dining room attached to the living room, where I waved to Alicia and Chris, who were chatting on the couch.

I walked up the stairs that led to the captain's room.

I knocked on the door, wondering if Strand was even in there.

The door opened quickly, as Strand moved to let me in.

I looked around at all the different buttons and screens.

Then I noticed the large windows.

I stared out them, getting another hazy glance at the faint city skyline.

"You're on time." Strand's voice boomed out, drawing my attention back to the current situation.

I looked away from the window and saw him leaning against a desk, his arms crossed.

I nodded. "I set an alarm."

I walked closer to him, fishing out a piece of paper from my jeans' pocket.

"Here's the address." I said as I handed him the folded up piece of paper.

I walked closer towards the windows, getting a better look at San Fran in the distance, more memories flooding into my thoughts.

"You sure about this?" Strand asked me, after several moments of silence.

I looked over at him. "About what? Going to Coronado?"

"About leaving."

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be? I mean I told you yesterday that it's time to let the city go and move on."

He stared at me for several seconds, surveying my face, possibly seeing through my partial bullshit.

"You say that." He started. "But do you really mean it?"

I shifted uncomfortably, as he continued to stare at me.

"How did you feel, when you had to finally leave Mexico? When you had to leave Thomas?" I asked.

He chuckled briefly. "How did I _feel_?"

"Yes." I replied firmly. "How did you feel knowing that you couldn't stay? No matter how much you wanted to make it work, you knew deep down, that it was done. That it was over for good."

I paused. "How did you feel when you finally realized that the life you thought you'd have, was gone?"

Strand was quiet for several moments, sorting through his thoughts.

"Empty." He finally replied.

"I think if I hadn't met Nick, empty would be a good adjective." I replied. "Part of me is whole, but there will always be this small emptiness inside me."

We stared at one another again, an unspoken understanding forming between us.

"I can say from experience, that I'm not sure that emptiness will ever completely go away." Strand said.

I shrugged. "I'm not sure I want it to. I think that's the part that still makes us human."

"I suppose you're right." He replied. "The life that lays out in front of you now may not be easy, but I can assure you, it's the life you were _meant_ to have."

I laughed briefly. "I'm not sure I fully believe that."

"Oh, Cassie." Strand smiled. "You and I, we're not so different."

"How do you figure?" I asked.

"We are a bit different than the rest of the world. We both think a step or two ahead of our current actions. We have always been in the mindset of something like this happening. We were prepared for this, whether we knew it or not." He began. "Now tell me, were you ever _really_ satisfied with your old life?"

I pondered what he was asking me.

"Part of me was." I paused. "But you're right. I always knew that I could figure my way through things that most people couldn't."

"And that's why you and Nicholas get along so well. You both were too good for the old world. You both get what needs to be done now. That's why you've both made it. And you've found each other."

"That may be a bit of a stretch. I mean, there aren't many people left to be found, in the first place. It was only a matter of time before we stumbled upon one another."

Strand shook his head. "It was fate. Everything in your life, was leading up to this. It was leading up to you not only meeting Nick, but also meeting all of us, at a time we all needed someone like you."

"I'm glad to be a part of it all." I replied.

"And we're glad to have you."

"I'm sure about leaving." I said.

Strand gave me a small smile. "Then let's get going."

He took a seat in front of a large monitor. He unfolded the paper I had handed him and began to type it into the computer.

After several minutes, he stood back up and faced me.

I could feel the boat starting to move.

"Next stop, Coronado." He said.

I smiled lightly as I made my way towards the door.

I paused and looked back at Strand. "Thanks."

He gave me a smile and a nod before I exited the room, closing the door behind me.

I made my way onto the main level of the boat, I pondered at the bottom of the steps on whether I wanted to go back down to me and Nick's room, or if I wanted a little time to fully process everything.

I made my way out onto the boat's deck, and decided I needed a little alone time.

I sat and watched the boat move swiftly over the sea, the wind whipping through my hair.

About an hour passed before I could hear someone walking up behind me.

I glanced over my shoulder to see Nick approaching me.

He smiled down at me, although I could see a confused look come over his face.

"Here you are." He said.

"You say that as if I really have anywhere else to go." I smiled.

He sat next to me. "There's no way you've been talking to Strand for this long. Is there?"

I laughed. "No. No. Our meeting was pretty brief. But what we did talk about, really got me thinking."

"Can I ask what you talked about?" Nick asked, his brown puppy eyes staring at me.

I nodded. "He wanted to make sure I really wanted to leave."

"Do you? I mean I know leaving your home can be hard."

"Yeah. I do. I want to go. I'm ready to let it go." I replied.

"You mean the whole thing with Craig and your old group?"

"Yes, mostly that." I started. "But…there are a lot of other things that I can't keep holding on to. Not if I want to move forward."

"What else do you need to let go?" Nick asked, concerned.

I sighed. "I…I don't think it's a good idea to get into it."

"Cassie, I know you don't like talking about the past. But you know whatever it is, you can tell me."

"Nick, I-"

"Even if I can't relate to it, or understand it, I'll still listen and try everything I can do to make you feel better."

I stared over at him, seeing the look in his eyes, practically begging for me to let him in.

"I don't want to upset you, or make things complicated. We're in such a good place, Nick. And I don't want us to stray from it. I don't want anything to come between us."

"Whatever it is, you not opening up to me and letting me in, is going to come between us. Eventually." Nick replied.

"Nick…"

"No, Cassie. I'm serious. We can't keep things from each other. In a normal world, that's a bad thing. In this world, it could get us killed."

"I think you're being a bit overdramatic."

"You don't get it!" Nick said, starting to get frustrated.

"What don't I get?" I asked, becoming equally frustrated.

"I spent a big chunk of my life, keeping things from the people I loved the most. And now I've been given a second chance. A clean slate to start over with. And I'm not going back to the person I used to be." Nick replied as he stood up.

"No one's asking you to." I protested.

"If you want to keep secrets, fine. That's your choice, and I can't force you to open up to me. But I won't sit around and be a part of it." He added. "Come find me when you're ready to be honest."

"Nick, come on." I started as he began to walk away from me. "Nick!"

He kept walking and didn't look back at me.

Why did I have to be so stubborn? Why did I have to subconsciously be pushing Nick away?

He had done so much for me and risked his life for mine. Everything I had, I owed to him. Without him, I would have been alone.

I had to tell him.

I got up and started making my way down the stairs and to the room we shared.

I opened the door, and saw Nick sitting on the bed, his head in his lap.

"You're right. Keeping things from you will destroy us, in more ways than one." I spoke quickly, as he looked up at me.

"It's just-" I took a big sigh. "What I'm about to tell you, I don't know how you'll react. I don't want you to think of our relationship in a negative light. I don't want you to second guess what we have."

I took a step over to him, looking down at him as his brown eyes gazed up at me. "Because I assure you, what we have is real. You mean _everything_ to me, Nick. Don't ever forget that."

He continued to stare at me, encouraging me to keep going.

"Let me tell you everything, before you say anything okay?" I asked.

He nodded in return.

I took a seat next to him on the bed. I began to fidget nervously.

"I have to leave San Francisco. Staying here isn't an option, because I have to be able to let go of-"

I paused and took in another deep breath. "I have to let go of-"

Another pause, as I tried to hold back my emotions. "Sam."

Nick's eyes softened a bit, as he glanced down at his lap.

"I'm sorry. I don't want you to think that I don't care about you, or that you were some kind of last resort, or that you were a rebound. Because after Sam died, I told myself that I would never go through that again. But then I met you. And suddenly I realized that I didn't want to ever not be by your side. But-" I paused again, trying to choose my words carefully.

"But, I didn't deal with his death. I didn't know how to. Everything happened so quickly. One minute he was here, the next he wasn't. I don't know how to process that. His death was the first one I experienced. He was the first one to get bitten."

Tears started falling from my eyes, as I tried to push through to get it all out to Nick.

"And then…I just…left. I just left him. I saw how scared he was, how confused and in shock he was, by what was happening. His eyes were _screaming_ at me, as if I needed to do something. But I just stood there. Listening to everyone I loved scream out in pain. My eyes locked on his as he was being-" I choked on my words, trying my hardest to continue "I'm haunted by that look in his eyes, by everything I experienced that night."

I looked over at Nick. "I have to leave. I have to let it go, or else it will destroy me."

With that I began to sob, as tears began pouring out of my eyes, like a running faucet.

I felt Nick's hands gently cup the sides of my face, as he began to wipe my tears away with his thumbs.

"Hey, hey." He whispered softly. "Hey, it's okay. It's alright."

I tried to get words out, but all I could manage were deep, gasping breaths, as I tried to calm myself down.

"Shhh. Don't cry. It's okay. Everything's okay." Nick's soothing voice came again.

He gently wrapped his arms around my trembling body, as he pulled me into his chest.

My tears continued to flow, making his soft cotton t-shirt beneath my face wet.

I felt his hand reach up and gently stroke my hair, as he continued to hold me tightly.

"You're okay. Everything's going to be okay. I promise." He cooed, as if he was comforting a baby, who fell and scraped their knee.

My breath began to steady, as I got lost in the moment we were having, feeling better about the release I was experiencing.

"Shhh. It's alright."

After several more moments, I felt myself starting to gain control of my emotions.

I sat up slowly, as I stared at Nick, his eyes soft and tender.

He reached up and gently wiped my tear stained cheek, still staring at me softly.

His hand rubbed my cheek ever so gently, for several moments, before I leaned in and kissed him.

I broke away from our sweet kiss, as I stared at him.

I couldn't fight what I was feeling for him anymore.

I needed to give myself to him, completely. Once and for all.

I felt the words burning in my chest, about to explode out of me.

"I love you, Nick." I whispered, barely audible.

He looked slightly taken aback, but completely unshocked by my statement, at the same time.

Without missing a beat, he responded, almost as if he had been waiting a long time to speak such a meaningful sentence, and had to get it out.

"I love you too, Cassie."

Those words left his perfect lips, and I lunged into him, kissing him passionately.

His hands reached up to the back of my neck, pulling me in closer.

The saltiness from my tears, mixing with the taste of maple syrup from his breakfast waffles, was oddly intoxicating.

Memories of the first time we slept together, came flooding back to me.

I pulled him closer to me, as I wrapped my hands into his messy hair.

I needed him in this moment, so badly.

But then I remembered, the stitched up bullet wound in his side.

I broke away from our kissing, our breaths ragged from the excitement.

"Nick…" I started. "We can't. Your side-"

"Is fine." He replied, as he started kissing me again.

I shook my head, moving back from him. "No, what if it's not fine yet?"

Nick looked at me for several moments.

He then took his hands at the hem of his t-shirt and lifted it up over his head, tossing it to the floor.

He grabbed my hand and placed it on his scar.

"Feel me." He said. "I'm okay."

I began to lightly trace my fingers over his scarred skin, his eyes closing under the feeling of my touch.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

He opened his eyes and nodded. "I'm ready."

I leaned in and began kissing him again, gentle at first, but the heat between us was escalating quickly.

I grabbed Nick behind the neck and pulled him on top of me, as I fell back gently on the bed.

I ran my hands over his bare back, feeling his muscles twinge under my touch.

He broke away from my lips and began kissing my neck tenderly, nipping at my skin sporadically.

He began to move down towards my legs, as he unbuttoned my jeans and pulled them off of me.

He started kissing my thighs, before he removed my underwear, tossing it to the ground.

I sat up on my elbows, and bathed in Nick's intense glare, as he stared up at me.

He climbed back up to me, as we began kissing again.

I found my way to the button of his jeans, as I undid it, pushing them past his hips.

Nick stood up, and removed his pants, followed by his boxers.

He stood in front of me, fully exposed, looking at me like nothing or no one in the world mattered anymore.

I grabbed the hem of my shirt, and lifted it up over my head, becoming completely naked in the process.

Nick stared down at me, a small smile coming over his perfect face.

He reached down and tucked my hair behind my ear, his thumb tracing over my cheek afterwards.

My eyes fluttered shut briefly, before I grabbed his forearms and pulled him gently back on top of me.

He hovered above me and kissed me sweetly, before he entered me.

I let out a gasp, trying not to be loud, seeing as this time we most certainly were not alone.

I could feel his body tense up with pleasure, as we began to move in sync.

He buried his face in my neck, biting me as he let out a groan.

"Nick." I breathed, as I reveled in the moment we were in.

He kissed me behind my ear and down to my collar bone, making muffled groans as he went.

He reached up to my arm laying above my head, and laced his fingers with mine, as he thrusted deeper in me.

I let out an involuntary moan, realizing immediately after that I needed to keep quiet.

Nick let out a small laugh, as a smile spread across his face.

He leaned down and kissed me.

I could feel his heart beating in his chest, against me.

I wrapped my legs around his waist, as I realized that we were about to reach the peak of our pleasure.

I felt Nick tremble beneath me, as his breath became ragged.

"Cassie." He breathed, against my lips, his breath hot.

I arched my back, and let out another moan, trying my hardest to keep the volume down, although I wasn't very successful.

I felt waves of pleasure wash over me, as Nick released himself, moaning in the process.

He kissed me gently, before he rolled off of me, and laid next to me.

I looked over at him, as he pulled me closer, our bare skin touching once again.

I rolled on my side, and faced him.

I stared at him for several moments, before I snuggled my face in his chest, listening to his slowly steadying heartbeat.

He rested his chin on the top of my head, and let out a long breath.

We stayed like that for several minutes, both of us soaking in every perfect second.

I was felt so lucky to have Nick in my life, to have stumbled upon him.

He kissed the top of my head, and then started sitting up, gently rolling me off of his chest in the process.

I stared at him, unsure of why he was cutting this perfect moment we were having short.

He stood up fully and began to pull on his boxers and pants.

"Get dressed." He said gently.

I looked up at him, confused.

"There's something we need to do." He said as he pulled his t-shirt over his head.

I still looked at him, baffled, as I began to slowly sit up in the bed.

"Just trust me." He reassured me.

Without saying anything, I stood up and began to put my clothes back on.

Nick smiled down at me briefly, as confusion was still plastered all over my face.

"Come on." He said, as he outreached his hand to me.

I grabbed his hand, and followed him out of our bedroom and up the stairs to the main floor.

He gently pulled me along behind him, as we stepped out onto the boat's deck.

The wind was going crazy, now that the boat was moving a bit faster.

We walked all the way over to the railing.

"Good. We're not too late." Nick spoke, as he stared off into the distance.

"Not too late?" I asked. "For what? You to push me off the boat?"

Nick smiled at me and laughed. "Not quite."

"Then what?" I asked.

Nick grabbed my hand tighter and pulled me closer to him, as he positioned me directly facing the water, my back towards him.

"Look." He said.

"Look at what? The water?" I asked, still completely in the dark.

Nick shook his head. He then wrapped his arms around me. " _Just look_."

I stared off and focused on the distant horizon.

"What do you see?" He asked.

"I can faintly still see the city, I think." I replied.

"Good. I can see it too." He replied.

"Okay…" I said, confused.

"What you said to me earlier, about Sam, I figured you needed one last goodbye." Nick started. "And I figured I'd say goodbye with you."

I looked back at him, as he stared down at me, sweetly.

"I know I didn't know him, but I know he was a huge part of your life and he meant a great deal to you. And if he's someone you cared about, someone you loved, then he must have been a great person. Because I know you don't give away that love to just anyone."

"Nick." I started, feeling overwhelmed by how sweet he was being.

He shook his head. "This isn't about me, it's about Sam."

I stared at him for a few moments, before I turned back around and faced the water.

"Take as much time as you need. We can watch the city disappear together." His voice came behind me.

I closed my eyes, took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, feeling the salt in the air on my tongue.

I opened them up and watched as the boat moved us farther and farther away from San Francisco.

After several minutes, all I could see in the faint skyline's place was a soft haze.

"Goodbye." I whispered.

I looked back at Nick, as he smiled down at me.

I stood up on my tiptoes and gave him a gentle kiss.

"Thank you." I said.

"No problem." He replied, as we exchanged smiles.


	14. Chapter 14

Two days had passed, and we were finally approaching Coronado.

Nick and I stood in Strand's captain's quarters, while he pressed several buttons and stared intensely out the large window in front of him.

I was feeling slightly tense, not sure what to expect once we docked and got off the boat.

Nick stood behind me, his arms wrapped around my waist, as he rested his chin gently on top of my head.

"Everything okay, Strand?" Nick asked.

Strand gave us a brief thumbs up, as he continued to stare out at the approaching shoreline.

"So focused you forgot how to speak." Nick joked.

Strand ignored him.

"Shhh." I shushed Nick, gently, as I patted his arm.

"Not you too?"

I moved away from him slightly, and stared up at his brown eyes.

"Not a good time for jokes." I whispered, trying not to distract Strand.

"Sorry." Nick smiled, as he pulled me back into his arms.

"It's alright." I replied.

"I just can't wait to get off this boat. For good. And have some privacy." Nick said, as he nuzzled his face into the crook of my neck.

"Don't get your hopes up." Strand's voice boomed, as he still stared out the windows.

My anxiety kicked in, as I squirmed out of Nick's arms and made my way over to Strand. "Why, is there something wrong? Is it taken over?"

Strand looked over at me, seeing the panic on my face. "Too soon to tell. But so far, it looks okay."

He pointed to the shoreline. I could see some houses, through the haze that surrounded us.

I felt my heart start to steady back to a somewhat normal pace.

I nodded, trying to calm myself down. "Yeah. Okay. Good."

Nick walked over to me and placed his hand on the small of my back.

I crossed my arms and began to tap my fingers nervously on my forearms.

"Hey, let's give Strand some space." Nick suggested, as he noticed how nervous I was.

I looked over at him. "No, I need to stay here, to make sure everything's okay. Make sure I didn't lure everyone in to a giant death trap."

"Cassie, don't talk like that. We're going to be fine. I just think we should go back to the room before your heart gives out." He replied.

"What? I'm not nervous. I'm- I'm fine."

"I can hear your heart beating so loudly, for a second, I thought it was my own." Strand said.

I looked at him and then back at Nick.

Nick grabbed my hand, as he gave me a reassuring smile. "Come on."

"Go with him. I work best alone." Strand said.

I reluctantly agreed, as I turned and made my way towards the door, Nick's hand still in mine as he followed behind me.

We walked down the stairs and onto the main floor.

I glanced out the open doors that led to the deck. "Maybe I'll just watch from the deck." I said to Nick as I began to walk towards the glass doors.

I felt resistance, as Nick held his spot and didn't follow behind me.

"Cass, come on. Strand's got this under control. Let's go relax." He pulled me towards him, as he began to lead me down the stairs to our room.

We made it into our bedroom, as he shut the door behind him.

I paced the room slightly, starting to bite my nails.

"I can't relax." I said.

I felt Nick walk up behind me, as he placed his hands on my shoulders, stopping me from walking.

He started massaging them. "Then let me help you."

I gave into the massage, closing my eyes slightly as my shoulders relaxed into Nick's hands.

"I'm just worried." I started. "What if it's gone? What if there's nothing left?"

"It's all still there, trust me. Strand said it looked okay so far. You could see some houses. Everything's there." Nick replied.

I let out a long sigh.

He tapped my shoulder lightly, as I looked back to him motioning for us to go sit on the bed.

He sat down and patted the spot in front of him.

"We have nowhere else to go. If this place is done for, _we're_ done for."

"We will find somewhere else to go. We've got all the time in the world. And I promise you, I won't stop looking until you are happy and safe."

I walked over and took a seat next to him.

I leaned in and gave him a soft kiss.

Then I turned around and faced my back towards him, as he started massaging me again.

I let out a small moan as his hit a tender spot on the back of my neck.

I closed my eyes and let myself finally relax.

"You really have been tense lately." Nick said, in almost a whisper, as he worked more on my neck.

"Yeah, well I made a promise to everyone that I had a safe place to go, and I'm hoping the universe keeps up her end of the deal."

"She will."

I let out another tiny moan, as he moved his thumbs deeper into my skin.

"You give good massages." I said.

Nick smirked. "I'm pretty good with my hands, as you know."

"Oh, I know." I breathed.

We were silent for several moments, and I felt Nick loosen his hands.

He gently ran his thumb down the back of my neck, until he hit the top of my tank top.

I let out a relaxed sigh, as I practically melted under his touch.

His hands slid down my body, until they held onto my waist.

I then felt his lips gently kiss the back of my neck, his breath tickling me.

He began to kiss me all over my back, and on the sides of my neck.

"Nick…" I whispered.

He grabbed my waist harder and pulled me closer to him.

He nipped at my neck before he started gently sucking, my breath becoming more ragged, as I gave into his wants.

I reached up and placed my hand in his hair, pulling on it.

He let out a small grunt before he pulled me around to him and we started kissing.

I could feel the heat between us rising quickly.

I spun around and faced him completely.

I broke away from his mouth, and stared at him for several seconds, as he gently rubbed the back of my head.

I put both of my hands on his shoulders and pushed him back onto the bed.

A sly smirk came over his face, as I climbed on top of him.

I needed to get all my pent up tension out, and Nick was a great way to release all my anxiety, and distract myself from everything.

I hovered above him and began kissing his neck, tangling my hands in his hair.

Nick grabs my hair, pulling my head upwards, stopping my nipping and biting on his neck.

We start kissing, our hands running over one another, getting closer to the point of no return.

"Take your pants off. Now." Nick demanded, momentarily pausing our kissing.

I sat up fully, still straddling him, as I slowly began to unbutton and unzip my jeans.

Suddenly, I felt a huge jolt.

The whole bedroom shook.

I tumbled off of Nick's lap, landing on the floor with a thud.

"Holy shit!" I heard Nick yell as he sat up in the bed.

He stood up and reached for my hand, helping me stand up.

I quickly buttoned and zipped my pants up, and the two of us ran out into the hallway.

Alicia and Ofelia were coming out of their rooms as well, all of us exchanging 'what the fuck' looks to one another.

Another huge bump, as all of us were flung into the right side of the hallway, Nick and I slamming into the wall, as Alicia tumbled to the floor.

"What is happening?" She yelled, Ofelia helping her up.

"Get upstairs!" Nick yelled, as he grabbed onto my waist.

The four of us climbed our way up the steps, and onto the main floor.

Another huge bump sent us flying off to the right again, Nick's arms wrapped around me tightly, trying to keep us steady.

I could see Madison and Travis out on the boat's deck, yelling something to Salazar.

Another loud bang, Alicia screaming as things on the shelves next to her came flying off, some breaking on the hard wood floors beneath us.

"Go out with mom!" Nick yelled to her.

I grabbed Nick's hand and started running up towards the control room, where I hoped Strand still was.

I held onto the railing and another jolt stuck the boat.

I flung the door open and saw Strand looking as equally confused as the rest of us.

"What the hell is happening?" I yelled at him, racing over to the windows.

"We hit something, and now it seems, we're stuck." Strand replied, as he kept trying to move the boat forward.

Another huge bump sent me stumbling into the window in front of me, Nick grabbing onto me.

"Stop!" I yelled. "Stop trying to move us!"

"We're almost unstuck." Strand said as he pushed the boat forward again.

Nick and I both flung over to the left this time, hitting the wall.

"DAMMIT!" Strand yelled. "SHIT!"

"What?!" Nick asked frantically.

"Get your stuff! NOW!" He yelled as he ran towards the door, flinging it open and running down the stairs.

Nick and I followed him.

"Strand, we're sinking!" Travis yelled as he made his way into the living room.

"EVERYONE GET YOUR THINGS! YOU'VE GOT FIVE MINUTES!" Strand yelled before disappearing.

"We're fucking _sinking_?!" I asked Nick.

"Come on!" Nick yelled, as he grabbed my hand.

We ran down the stairs towards our bedroom.

I felt sick to my stomach.

Our safe haven was dying.

The weight of the undead world now hanging on my shoulders.

Our only option was now my vacation house.

This was the beginning of the end.

And I could feel it.


	15. Chapter 15

I could feel myself panicking more and more, by the second.

Nick was racing around the room, trying to pack up the rest of his things.

"Cassie!" He yelled, trying to bring me out of my trance like state.

"Oh, god! Oh, shit!" I blurted out.

I started frantically pacing the room again. "The boat is sinking! The boat is _fucking sinking_! What are we going to do?"

"Cassie, come on! You need to pack the rest of your stuff!"

I shook my head. "My house- what if my house is gone? Where will we go?"

"Your house is there! It's fine, I promise!"

Tears started pouring from my eyes. "No, no. We have no backup plan! We're going to be stranded here! Shit! _Shit_! I've ruined everything!"

Nick stopped packing and walked over to me.

He grabbed my shoulders and looked down at me intensely.

"Cassie, please. Grab your things. Everything's fine. But we have to go. We have to go now, okay? Please help me get your stuff together."

"N-no, no…"

"Yes, we have to go. We have to get your things together and go, okay?"

"I-I can't do this." I started. "Nick, _I can't do this_."

"Yes, you can. You can do this. Do this for me. Please, do this for _me_. I love you. I'll be right beside you, no matter what happens. Just _please_ help me pack your stuff." Nick pleaded.

I snapped back to reality, wiping my tears away.

"Yes, yeah. Okay." I replied as I began to run around the room with Nick, grabbing everything I owned and shoving it into my bag.

"Got everything?" Nick asked.

I nodded.

He walked over to me and helped me pull my stuffed backpack over my shoulders.

"Okay, let's go." He kissed my forehead and grabbed my hand, leading me towards the door.

I was still in a daze, in shock at how quickly everything went back to being unpredictable and scary.

We paused at Alicia's door, as Nick dragged me inside her room.

"Come on! We got to go!" Nick said to her.

She nodded, putting her last pile of stuff in her bag.

She swung the bag over her shoulder and followed us back out into the hallway and up the stairs.

We ran out onto the deck, where Chris, Ofelia, and Salazar were waiting to hop on the small motor boat.

Strand was already in the boat, waiting for us.

"Let's get going, people! Hurry up!" He yelled, as he helped them get in the boat.

"Alicia, take Cassie and get in the boat." Nick said.

He turned to me and cupped his hands around my face. "Alicia will help you get in the boat, okay?"

"No. Where are you going?" I asked.

"I need to go find my mom and Travis." He replied. "Go with Alicia. I'll be right back."

I shook my head. "I'm coming with you."

"No, just get in the boat." He demanded.

Alicia grabbed onto my arm and started pulling me towards the stairs leading to the lower deck, as Nick ran off back inside the boat.

"Nick!" I yelled after him.

"Come on!" Alicia said as she pulled me along behind her.

We walked down to the boat, where Strand was standing waiting for us.

He reached out his hand for me to climb into the boat.

I looked back, to see if I could spot where the others were.

I grabbed his hands, as he helped me step into the small boat safely.

"Where the hell is everyone else?" Strand asked.

"They're coming." Alicia replied, as Strand helped her.

"They have two minutes, before I leave without them." Strand replied.

"What?!" I shouted at Strand.

"It's fine, it's fine. He's joking." Alicia said to me. "What a terrific time to make jokes."

I sat, nervously biting my nails, waiting for Nick to return.

Alicia sat down next to me, lacing her arm with mine, giving me a comforting smile.

I felt the pit in my stomach growing stronger, for the next several agonizing minutes that I waited for Nick to return.

Finally, I saw him running towards the boat, Madison and Travis following behind.

"About damn time." Strand said, as they approached us.

Nick turned around and helped his mom into the boat, followed by Travis.

I looked up at Nick, my eyes practically begging him to grab on to me and not let go.

He climbed in and sat across from me, reaching his hand out towards mine, giving me his signature smile.

I grabbed his hand, lacing my fingers with his.

I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh, trying to steady my racing heartbeat.

"Hold on, we're on the move!" Strand said as he started to move the tiny boat.

We gained speed, the wind whipping through everyone's hair.

We passed by the sinking boat.

All of us watching, as the life we knew slowly disappearing.

"Hey, we're going to be okay." Nick said to me.

I looked at him, his eyes soft and comforting.

I gave him a small smile, as I gripped onto his hand tighter.

We were suddenly covered in a dense fog; we could barely see anything.

Strand slowed the boat down, as to not hit anything and cause us a repeat of the recent scenario.

It was an odd feeling, an odd setting.

Everything and everyone was quiet.

We were surrounded by this endless white cloud.

Everyone sat very still, staring all around us, trying to find a point of reference.

"Strand, do you know where you're going?" Travis asked.

Strand was silent for several moments, his focus straight in front of him.

"I mapped it out when we were on the boat. I'm trying to follow that map, the best I can."

We inched our way forward, trying to make it to land.

"Cassie, you and Nick were helping Strand this morning. Did anything look or feel familiar?" Madison asked me.

"Uhm…I couldn't see much, but from what I could tell, it looked like we were going to end up on the north side." I replied.

"Is that close to your house?" She asked.

"It's sort of in the middle, more towards the south middle. But it's not far. I know my way around."

"Take into account, that we're not sure what state everything's going to be in. The trek may be harder than expected. So be prepared." Strand chimed in.

"And we'll be doing it by foot." Travis said.

"Fantastic." Salazar scoffed.

"I can hot wire us a car, several cars." Nick said.

" _If_ we can find cars." Salazar said.

"Cars draw too much attention." Strand stated.

We were silent, as we processed the realness of the situation we were in.

We now were going to be completely at the mercy of the world.

All we could do was hope that everything would work in our favor.

Now that Strand's boat was gone, we had no backup plan.

We were going to be risking it all, all for my vacation house, and the promises it brought.

I was having flashbacks of when I lost my camp, when it got taken over, and I was left to fend for myself.

I was scared, and had no plan, no idea what would be around the next corner.

I had to live every day, every moment, in the unknown.

When I had finally found other people, they turned out to be worse than being alone.

I prayed we didn't stumble upon another group that resembled my old one.

But that was out of my control.

It was out of any of our control.

What happened once we stepped foot on that sandy shore, was a complete mystery.

We all had to brace ourselves for the worst.

Because in a world like this, the worst case scenario was always the one that became a reality.

History really does repeat itself.

And my history, was a bitch.


End file.
